Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

GoldFishPony

Online | Search for a member

GoldFishPony

9Fucked!

GoldFishPony
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 16 March 1997 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5508
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About GoldFishPony : Yo I read manga, play video games, watch YouTube videos, and watch a few anime. That is my life right now

GoldFishPony's page activity

Visits<b>Jake42100</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 4:05pm<b>Morryo</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 3:16pm<b>Angsty_Armadillo</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:13pm<b>bnbhimp</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 2:12am<b>xWhymex123</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 10:48pm<b>Ariel_Trevino</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 8:35pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 8:31pm<b>CCSA</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:54am<b>ImARaspberry</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 5:56pm<b>spankykilla</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 4:40pm<b>emeraldmyst</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 9:23pm<b>freeport_aidan</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 11:16am<b>axfabxdisaster</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 10:44am<b>Spencyy</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 10:42am<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:51am<b>blubje</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:30am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 6:48am<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 4:43am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:48pm<b>psshhh</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:46am<b>Chingleberry</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 4:56am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 1:24am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 2:56am<b>thankssomuch</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 3:57am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 10:12am<b>Ao_Ken</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 1:11pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:36am

GoldFishPony's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of GoldFishPony's badges

GoldFishPony's favorite FMLs

Today, I forbade a student in the writing seminar I instructed from continuing to present his disturbing poems about demons. He responded to this by convincing nearly every other student in the seminar to write and read out loud several of his poems. FML

#21429629
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19224) - you deserved it (7437)

On 06/21/2015 at 4:42pm - work - by ihateloopholes (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

#21427606
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29786) - you deserved it (8531)

On 06/17/2015 at 2:09pm - kids - by RecentCollegeGrad (woman) -

Today, I found out that my homophobic boyfriend, who I was giving a chance to grow the fuck up and get over his obsession with bashing gays, has been cheating on me with another man. FML

#21425403
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36882) - you deserved it (4151)

On 06/13/2015 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found my boyfriend and his friends laughing hysterically and practically choking on popcorn. They were watching a video of me in a school play, trying to sing while sobbing because I'd just pissed my pants in front of 200 people. Thanks for giving him the video, mom. FML

#21422192
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30145) - you deserved it (2227)

On 06/07/2015 at 5:46am - misc - by .......... (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I uploaded a photo of myself at the beach on Facebook. The first comment it got was "Wow!! If I was 20 yrs younger, oh boy ;)". Yeah, thanks for that, grandpa. FML

#21418445
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26573) - you deserved it (2437)

On 05/31/2015 at 5:13am - misc - by disgusting (woman) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, I saw my uncle, whom I have not seen in five years, at a family gathering. His reaction to seeing me? "Holy SHIT you have BOOBS! The guys must be all over you!" I awkwardly replied, "No..." Then he muttered, "I know I would." FML

Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML

#21412889
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34834) - you deserved it (2621)

On 05/20/2015 at 4:45am - intimacy - by wtf bro (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I had to pick my brother up from work because he broke down crying. I arrived to find that apparently, you can get so stoned that serving a pregnant woman at a fast food joint moves you to tears over the miracle of life. FML

#21409953
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30168) - you deserved it (2213)

On 05/14/2015 at 10:23am - misc - by sistertaxi - Australia

Today, I realized that my new haircut makes me look like a movie star. Not Scarlett Johansson, no. I look like Lord Farquaad. FML

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for public sex. FML

#21399557
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38862) - you deserved it (2790)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:05pm - love - by RBergman - United States (Wyoming)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41894) - you deserved it (2834)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dad tricked the local biker gang into believing he's actually part of the Russian mob. FML

Today, I heard my 2-year-old sister crying, so I left my room to comfort her. She looked at me, held my hand, escorted me back to my room and closed the door. FML

#21392817
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30388) - you deserved it (2780)

On 04/13/2015 at 6:46am - kids - by transcendingnerd (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I went on a date with a cute guy I met at a bookstore. He stood up and said he was leaving when I said that I didn't like 50 Shades of Grey, because he, "doesn't want to be near a bitch who doesn't know her place". He then told me to give him a ride home. FML

#21392816
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34149) - you deserved it (2824)

On 04/13/2015 at 6:43am - love - by whymanwhy (woman) - Czech Republic

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35447) - you deserved it (2355)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)



FML's blog

  • Tania's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! How are you all doing? This week has been quite eventful for some people. Uber has been causing taxi drivers here and there to get their knickers in a twist, notable over here in France, which caused…

Friday 26 June 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: