About Goddess_Rummy : FML is really beginning to suck. =\
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37801) - you deserved it (6085)
On 12/01/2009 at 4:11pm - misc - by xXxJoe16xXx - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I took my girlfriend's 4-year-old son and four of his friends to the amusement park. While walking down a hill, I slipped on some water and slid down the hill, taking out multiple children. It wasn't rain. I'd slid on vomit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29475) - you deserved it (2067)
On 11/30/2009 at 12:22pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I posted a picture of my boyfriend and I kissing on facebook. He untagged himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26509) - you deserved it (13790)
On 11/30/2009 at 7:17am - love - by destiny147 (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, like many other days, I fell asleep in math class. Unlike other days, however, I woke up with a start while ripping a really loud fart in my sleep. The whole class heard it because it was during a lecture. Even the teacher was laughing at me and I had to walk, no, run out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6303) - you deserved it (19776)
On 11/24/2009 at 12:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26884) - you deserved it (3065)
On 11/23/2009 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by sickkid (man) - United States (California)
Today, I noticed that in my cover letter I wrote "I also have an eye.", instead of "I also have an eye for details.", and I have been sending it out for the past few weeks. No wonder I haven't gotten any replies. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6178) - you deserved it (19111)
On 11/14/2009 at 11:52am - work - by crazylobster (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14741) - you deserved it (23693)
On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)
Today, I realized that if you are too lazy to get completely dressed in the morning and only put on a top, you should not answer a Skype video call from your boss that involves you standing up, turning around and grabbing files from your filing cabinet all in clear view of your web cam. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5299) - you deserved it (26740)
On 11/11/2009 at 8:54pm - work - by julie (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was playing ball with my student during recess. My first attempt at throwing the ball hit him in the head. My second attempt hit him in the crotch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18241) - you deserved it (5554)
On 11/08/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, at work we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10050) - you deserved it (42210)
On 10/28/2009 at 6:29pm - work - by R (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)
Today, we were doing stretches in dance class where you are on your hands and doing the splits in the air while your partner helps hold you and stretch your legs further. Right as I lift my left leg up, I farted hugely right in my partner's face. I couldn't make eye contact for the rest of class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25861) - you deserved it (5990)
On 10/08/2009 at 1:05am - misc - by belle_arina (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because I'm in the military and I'm gone too much. The reason I enlisted in the first place is because we agreed that the money and benefits I would earn would help us be able to start a family in the future. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33012) - you deserved it (2605)
On 10/07/2009 at 2:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)
Today, I retook my ACT. I have been fighting a cold all week and have been very sneezy lately. Midway through the test, I got the urge to sneeze. Since it was very quiet and I didn't want to disturb the peace, I tried to hold my sneeze in. I ended up letting out a huge fart instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29138) - you deserved it (7266)
On 10/05/2009 at 10:21pm - misc - by Sneezy123 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19836) - you deserved it (2400)
On 09/27/2009 at 11:16pm - intimacy - by NiHao (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I woke up from a nap on my new bed to see my phone lit up with new texts. My friend sent out "Wanna test out my new bed?" as a mass text while I was asleep to every boy in my phone. Mark will be here in an hour, Jon wants to know what I'm wearing, and my ex's new girlfriend is not amused. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30411) - you deserved it (2507)
On 09/20/2009 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anathema_360 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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