Glitterhinoceros

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Glitterhinoceros

49Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 9 November 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7245
  • Number of comments : 293
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Glitterhinoceros : Please forgive if my English isn't perfect :c. My name is Brooke, and I live in Wales, which is in the UK x.X
I love people who are over 6', piggyback rides, toast, any kind of electro/tecktonik music, cuddling, and turtles c: I'm only like 5'2. Sad day. PINKIE PIE, BEEEEST FUCKING PONY.

Llamas. Nuff fucking said. Boners was like, my BFF and stuff :c BABY COME BACK, YOU CAN BLAME IT ALL, ON, ME?

I love people, I'm a happy person, and my family trade is welding x.X As long as people aren't Sidney Crosby, oh my gosh, I hope he dies in a fire, and gets hit by like, an Icecream truck, I just hope he gets like, stabbed by a walrus or something, oh my goodness I just hate him with a passion gaaaah, he ain't faaabulooous.

I love Ice hockey; Washington Captials, Ovechkin is my lover, He just doesn't know it yet. Crosby will die at our wedding.

GOT DEM PAAARAGRAPHS AND SHIT, WRITIN A STORY OVER HERE, AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIIIIME FO PARAGRAPHS, DON'T GIVE TWOO SHITS.

Glitterhinoceros's page activity

Visits<b>Blissment</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 9:28pm<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 8:21am<b>princeofgirl</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 3:05am<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 1:36pm<b>yagirlhaley</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 1:12am<b>laynethefirst</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 3:53pm<b>kitcattt</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 2:00pm<b>Phylo</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 11:16pm<b>MitchRapp</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 11:42pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 5:26pm<b>imcornelious</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 11:39pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 9:15am<b>jessamaryann</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 12:31am<b>dbpdp</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 10:55pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 4:46pm<b>Maximusmime</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 4:05pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:18pm<b>thatguy1531</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:49pm

Fucked!<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 2:22pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 10:46pm<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 12:51pm<b>Zacholicious</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 6:59pm<b>goodshadow2163</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 7:08pm<b>Immortal_Toaster</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 9:59am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 3:28am<b>zuvi9</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:07am<b>radiocaf</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 11:12am<b>sythe511</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 1:02am<b>krazy789</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 5:20am<b>Texan_here_</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 11:23pm<b>blackeyeidiot</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 5:19am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 12:45pm<b>tobyw95</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 2:53pm<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 5:04pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 4:15am<b>mannbryant</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:50pm

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Glitterhinoceros's favorite FMLs

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML

by captainocd / 08/19/2010 at 3:16pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my mom decided our whole family is going on a diet. Why? Because the vet told us our dog is overweight, and she "didn't want Twix to suffer alone." FML

by fatpooch / 05/13/2010 at 2:01am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I received a notice that my boyfriend had given me a rose via Happy Aquarium on Facebook. It came with a date cancellation so that he and his friends could play BioShock. FML

by Fv-day / 02/14/2010 at 11:32am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my boyfriend humped me to the tune of the Imperial March from Star Wars. FML

by ChubbyTubby / 01/17/2010 at 1:13pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek

Today, I went to buy my prom dress. I felt really good as I walked out of the dressing room, until someone walked out of the room next to me wearing the same dress, and looked better in it than I did. It was a man buying it for his drag show. FML

by draggirl / 10/13/2009 at 1:26pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2009 at 12:01am / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

by Ella / 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

by Soapy / 06/28/2009 at 3:23am / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

by herve / 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm / Lebanon (Beyrouth) / Intimacy

Today, I am wearing a panda suit for the promotion of the restaurant I work at. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 8:40am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML

by Dunzo15 / 05/02/2009 at 2:28am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I bought a coral colored hooded sweatshirt, which my girlfriend told me was "hot". I wore it to a baseball game tonight. When it got cold I put the hood over my head, only to hear everyone behind me laugh. The back of the hood said "Boy crazy". It was a teen girls sweatshirt. FML

by khood / 04/14/2009 at 1:10am / United States / Love