Glitterhinoceros

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Glitterhinoceros

50Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 9 November 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7333
  • Number of comments : 293
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Glitterhinoceros : Please forgive if my English isn't perfect :c. My name is Brooke, and I live in Wales, which is in the UK x.X
I love people who are over 6', piggyback rides, toast, any kind of electro/tecktonik music, cuddling, and turtles c: I'm only like 5'2. Sad day. PINKIE PIE, BEEEEST FUCKING PONY.

Llamas. Nuff fucking said. Boners was like, my BFF and stuff :c BABY COME BACK, YOU CAN BLAME IT ALL, ON, ME?

I love people, I'm a happy person, and my family trade is welding x.X As long as people aren't Sidney Crosby, oh my gosh, I hope he dies in a fire, and gets hit by like, an Icecream truck, I just hope he gets like, stabbed by a walrus or something, oh my goodness I just hate him with a passion gaaaah, he ain't faaabulooous.

I love Ice hockey; Washington Captials, Ovechkin is my lover, He just doesn't know it yet. Crosby will die at our wedding.

GOT DEM PAAARAGRAPHS AND SHIT, WRITIN A STORY OVER HERE, AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIIIIME FO PARAGRAPHS, DON'T GIVE TWOO SHITS.

Glitterhinoceros's page activity

Visits<b>SOILEDIT</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 2:57pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 1:59pm<b>Leo619</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 5:16pm<b>Lilo4life</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 5:28am<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 05/13/2016 at 2:03am<b>jbivens1992</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 5:39pm<b>Blissment</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 9:28pm<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 8:21am<b>princeofgirl</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 3:05am<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 1:36pm<b>yagirlhaley</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 1:12am<b>laynethefirst</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 3:53pm<b>kitcattt</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 2:00pm<b>Phylo</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 11:16pm<b>MitchRapp</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 11:42pm<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 03/24/2016 at 5:26pm<b>imcornelious</b> - the 03/20/2016 at 11:39pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 9:15am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 5:52pm<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 2:22pm<b>s1s1</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 10:46pm<b>Pokefinch27</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 12:51pm<b>Zacholicious</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 6:59pm<b>goodshadow2163</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 7:08pm<b>Immortal_Toaster</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 9:59am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 3:28am<b>zuvi9</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:07am<b>radiocaf</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 11:12am<b>sythe511</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 1:02am<b>krazy789</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 5:20am<b>Texan_here_</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 11:23pm<b>blackeyeidiot</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 5:19am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 12:45pm<b>tobyw95</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 2:53pm<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 5:04pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 4:15am

Glitterhinoceros's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Glitterhinoceros's favorite FMLs

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

by MLGreco / 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, I was at my job in the Halloween store. I had to tell someone, "Please stop hitting the Bieber wig with that pimp cane." FML

by katt_is_here / 10/02/2011 at 1:15am / United States (Colorado) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

by BigBananaLover / 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML

by Yuuucky / 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML

by RetroDayDreamer / 09/10/2011 at 11:46am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband went in for surgery and handed me an important document. It wasn't a will or anything similar, but a list of items and gold he wanted passed on to guild members on World of Warcraft. FML

by WoWWidow / 09/02/2011 at 4:02am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

by Username / 08/21/2011 at 5:59am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I got my tongue pierced, then went to a pet store. A clerk came up to ask if I needed help. I showed him I already had some fish, and said, "No thanks." He must have thought I was "special," as he bent down and in a baby voice, said "You got fishy? FISHY FISHY FISHY!" while poking the bag. FML

by aprilfools22 / 08/17/2011 at 4:13am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML

by secret dancer / 08/16/2011 at 12:55pm / Sweden (Jonkopings Lan) / Work

Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML

by brittbrat4 / 08/13/2011 at 2:51am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

by squishylog / 08/12/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, was the first day of my sophomore year. While receiving my schedule, I burst into tears at the sight of a disfigured midget. I'm now seen as the school bitch for making fun of a midget. I have a genuine fear of midgets. FML

by maryrain / 08/11/2011 at 5:35am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I lost my virginity to the woman of my dreams. I finished before entering. I'm 28 years old. FML

by James / 07/22/2011 at 1:00am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML

by Mom / 06/11/2011 at 1:25pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 4:53am / France / Intimacy