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Glitterhinoceros

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Glitterhinoceros

47Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 9 November 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7073
  • Number of comments : 293
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About Glitterhinoceros : Please forgive if my English isn't perfect :c. My name is Brooke, and I live in Wales, which is in the UK x.X
I love people who are over 6', piggyback rides, toast, any kind of electro/tecktonik music, cuddling, and turtles c: I'm only like 5'2. Sad day. PINKIE PIE, BEEEEST FUCKING PONY.

Llamas. Nuff fucking said. Boners was like, my BFF and stuff :c BABY COME BACK, YOU CAN BLAME IT ALL, ON, ME?

I love people, I'm a happy person, and my family trade is welding x.X As long as people aren't Sidney Crosby, oh my gosh, I hope he dies in a fire, and gets hit by like, an Icecream truck, I just hope he gets like, stabbed by a walrus or something, oh my goodness I just hate him with a passion gaaaah, he ain't faaabulooous.

I love Ice hockey; Washington Captials, Ovechkin is my lover, He just doesn't know it yet. Crosby will die at our wedding.

GOT DEM PAAARAGRAPHS AND SHIT, WRITIN A STORY OVER HERE, AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIIIIME FO PARAGRAPHS, DON'T GIVE TWOO SHITS.

Glitterhinoceros's page activity

Visits<b>Pokefinch27</b> - 4 hours ago<b>Nahpets</b> - yesterday at 4:49pm<b>LPac5295</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 9:21am<b>molloy2</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 11:09pm<b>fightyourtitle</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 10:17pm<b>mominlaw</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 3:38pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 8:20am<b>tylermitch</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 12:12am<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 5:15am<b>jdw17</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 6:05pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 3:11pm<b>Zacholicious</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 12:59pm<b>Twigman8</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 7:07am<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:26pm<b>goodshadow2163</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 5:21pm<b>iamtherealbatman</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 12:01am<b>EPKSPARTAN</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 4:41pm<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 4:06pm

Fucked!<b>Pokefinch27</b> - just now<b>Zacholicious</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 6:59pm<b>goodshadow2163</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 7:08pm<b>Immortal_Toaster</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 9:59am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 3:28am<b>zuvi9</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 1:07am<b>radiocaf</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 11:12am<b>sythe511</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 1:02am<b>krazy789</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 5:20am<b>Texan_here_</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 11:23pm<b>blackeyeidiot</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 5:19am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 12:45pm<b>tobyw95</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 2:53pm<b>gqlmno</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 5:04pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/30/2015 at 4:15am<b>mannbryant</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 10:50pm<b>timberguy</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 8:39pm<b>heartofhannah</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 6:38am

Glitterhinoceros's FML badges

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Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of Glitterhinoceros's badges

Glitterhinoceros's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my dad why there were no photos of me on the wall. He replied, "Every time you disappoint us we burn one." FML

#19586113
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33016) - you deserved it (5134)

On 05/07/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by N (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML

#19580511
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34520) - you deserved it (3959)

On 05/06/2012 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Kwalker3 - United States (California)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15108) - you deserved it (45546)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, my husband drew a penis on every one of my cigarettes. It's a new pack. FML

#19508691
297 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9272) - you deserved it (68064)

On 04/21/2012 at 11:15pm - misc - by Jenn P (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mum bought a phone. Since teaching her how to text, I have received 27 messages, repeatedly saying the word "penis". FML

#19505040
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25425) - you deserved it (4556)

On 04/21/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by jaderie - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

#19117009
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33328) - you deserved it (5067)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymoosey - Canada

Today, my brother's girlfriend broke up with him. He has been playing Whitney Houston's "I will always love you" all day. FML

#19045802
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32749) - you deserved it (3218)

On 02/11/2012 at 1:23am - love - by annon - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML

#18936421
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37600) - you deserved it (3389)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm - love - by Shelly P. (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I ran full speed into a brick wall because I saw a tiger. On the other side of a zoo cage. FML

#18583606
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8828) - you deserved it (34221)

On 12/22/2011 at 10:02pm - animals - by steve - United States

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13111) - you deserved it (95390)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

#18390822
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39238) - you deserved it (5735)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

#18338481
494 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49722) - you deserved it (4650)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by haunted (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

#18336712
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35261) - you deserved it (3646)

On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while working at my local supermarket, a customer threw a turkey at me because we "should have bigger ones." FML

Today, I got trapped in an elevator with a chicken. FML

#18334722
258 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32046) - you deserved it (4111)

On 11/24/2011 at 5:35am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom



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