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Ginger_Bastard

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Ginger_Bastard
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 163
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Ginger_Bastard's favorite FMLs

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8738) - you deserved it (68018)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML

#18350847
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6924) - you deserved it (56049)

On 11/25/2011 at 9:09pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML

#18283192
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36978) - you deserved it (5477)

On 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried sneaking over to my girlfriends house to be romantic and knocked on her window. She went and got her mother to see who was at the window. FML

#18101485
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13691) - you deserved it (18787)

On 10/29/2011 at 3:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML

#18035123
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35492) - you deserved it (9468)

On 10/20/2011 at 10:48pm - intimacy - by skinny dipper - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom yelled at me because I refused to lend her money. The reason I won't lend her money? The last time I did, she and my dad went out and bought a Macbook and a new car instead of paying bills. Apparently I'm being 'selfish' by keeping my own money and putting it towards university. FML

#17951348
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33295) - you deserved it (2031)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:24am - misc - by Anon (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend after helping him study for his ACT, giving him a back rub, and having really awesome sex with him. His reason for dumping me? He's too stressed out to have a girlfriend right now. FML

#17680129
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30233) - you deserved it (3736)

On 09/06/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by stupidboys - United States

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29474) - you deserved it (2849)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML

#17610443
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31530) - you deserved it (2436)

On 08/29/2011 at 4:33am - health - by SoupCanoe - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35451) - you deserved it (5399)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, the only thing that managed to get me out of bed was scrambling to watch my neighbours have a screaming match in the middle of our street about which one of their brain-dead kids spray-painted "CUNT FLAPS" and a rudimentary knob on the communal garage door. FML

#17266152
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17983) - you deserved it (2357)

On 07/26/2011 at 10:05am - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML

#17260985
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30102) - you deserved it (5989)

On 07/25/2011 at 11:35pm - misc - by Ima_Moronski - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly nice guy I met online. He was drunk when I got there. Within the first 10 minutes, he had told me I was "like Hitler but with boobs", and I was "offensive to the ninja community." Then he said I just wasn't all he had hoped for and left. FML

#17255469
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24892) - you deserved it (5638)

On 07/25/2011 at 3:24pm - misc - by ninja_blasphemer (woman) - Ireland (Wexford)

Today, I laughed when I saw my ex-girlfriend in her overall uniform, thinking she'd got a job as a janitor. Turns out she's as professional marine welder. She's 22 years old and earns my monthly salary in three days. My current girlfriend who was there with me called me a loser in front of her. FML

#16982648
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10289) - you deserved it (55035)

On 07/05/2011 at 3:06am - love - by eatmywords (man) - Singapore

Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML

#16301651
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47528) - you deserved it (3674)

On 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm - kids - by Adoptee (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)



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