About GhostDuck : I enjoy the randomness.
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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Today, after I went to collect my pay for babysitting, the girl's dad pulled the old "Can I pay you in Trident Layers?" bull on me. Hoping to show that I wasn't going to play ball, I told him that watching his gran inhale a cock would be funnier. If scowls could kill... FML
I agree, your life sucks (5581) - you deserved it (42225)
On 11/25/2011 at 9:09pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)
Today, when drunk, I became OCD about everything and spent 3 hours making sure that the books on my shelves were straight. I thought that being drunk was supposed to be fun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18018) - you deserved it (6930)
On 11/23/2011 at 1:40am - health - by OCDrunk (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, while jogging, I heard an odd clapping sound over the sound of my iPod. I stopped running, and the sound stopped. This continued for an hour before I realized the slapping sound was my thighs slapping together violently. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22632) - you deserved it (8149)
On 11/22/2011 at 10:21pm - health - by thunderthighs644 (woman) -
Today, I came home to find my dad's mid-life crisis has finally started. He's blacked all our windows, barricaded the door to the backyard, and set up a bunch of security cameras in and out of the house. It seems he's been reading up on Survivalist and Masonic conspiracy theory bullshit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16101) - you deserved it (1627)
On 11/21/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by whyyy (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, a policeman and me confronted my psychotic neighbor who stole my cat because she thinks flea bites cause cancer. She refused to tell us what she'd done with the cat. I just spent $100 last month in vet bills, and my kids are crying for their pet. He's probably in pieces in her freezer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31236) - you deserved it (1618)
On 11/14/2011 at 7:46pm - animals - by Stalked (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I woke up excited to go trick-or-treating, the treat being candy. Instead, my town has officially postponed Halloween due to blackouts. I guess this is where the trick comes in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17546) - you deserved it (2299)
On 10/31/2011 at 3:11pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was using my boyfriend's phone to call my mom. A text message arrived from "Christina" that said, "Just put the kids to bed, come over." He swears they're only work buddies, but refuses to tell her he has a girlfriend, to avoid making things weird at work. We've been together two years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24988) - you deserved it (3313)
On 10/30/2011 at 8:58pm - love - by Beantown girl (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29998) - you deserved it (3009)
On 10/03/2011 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Kayt (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, after months of telling my parents I was going to live on my own, I finally moved out. Not even 24 hours being out of their house, some reject burned down the apartment complex I live in. Guess who's moving back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24345) - you deserved it (1586)
On 09/28/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by Foreverathome - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28998) - you deserved it (16912)
On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my social anxiety got so bad that I'm now afraid to add people on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20029) - you deserved it (5778)
On 09/07/2011 at 1:23am - health - by pottie69 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25049) - you deserved it (2204)
On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)
Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25049) - you deserved it (2204)
On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27064) - you deserved it (3321)
On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)
Today, my family decided it would be hilarious to catch the biggest moths they could and let them loose in my room. I'm terrified of moths and they thought it would be 'funny as hell' to watch me freak out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20182) - you deserved it (3304)
On 08/18/2011 at 12:02am - misc - by livgasms - United Kingdom
Friday 24 May 2013
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