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GayBlowjob

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11590
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About GayBlowjob : I'm Ereik.

If you want to get to know me any more, and it really means that much to you, you can message me. Otherwise, don't expect much out of me.

♡Flowers will wither away, but a bomb-ass booty is forever.♡

look at my shitty shit at sadusa.tumblr.com & @h20_d on insta

GayBlowjob's page activity

Visits<b>SilverInGray</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 10:28pm<b>jasonm27</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 5:36am<b>Stuck1nher</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 11:51pm<b>3ph600v</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 6:08pm<b>hatchworth</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 8:54pm<b>Muddiggergirl</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 10:38pm<b>EverestMelting</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 5:58pm<b>AZ_Hockey_Dude</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 8:00pm<b>Agafue</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 8:57pm<b>aa1717</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 4:33pm<b>wdthompson1</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:24am<b>JessMac9000</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 1:28am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 1:12am<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 3:40am<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 05/17/2014 at 1:27pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:49pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 10:28pm<b>ChloeMiller18</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 1:57am

GayBlowjob's FML badges

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GayBlowjob's favorite FMLs

Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/14/2012 at 4:28pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, I brought a fluorescent tube to the store to make sure I got the correct replacement. Trying to charm the sexy cashier, I waved the tube in the air, saying "I need a new light sabre, there is no force left in this one and the Empire is attacking." Turns out she'd never heard of Star Wars. FML

Today, I received my first ever hand-job. It would have been great if she didn't wipe it across my face when I had finished and storm out of the room. FML

Today, I discovered both how much I really talk to myself when I'm drinking alone and how thin the walls of my apartment are. I heard my own slurred voice coming from my neighbor's apartment. They had recorded me and made a mixtape of some of the more interesting things I had said. FML

by talker / 11/14/2012 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing Apples to Apples with my girlfriend and a few others. The card that was drawn was labeled "pathetic". Among other cards that were laid down in attempts to be similar to "pathetic" was my girlfriend's card. She won with a create-a-card labeled "my sex life". FML

by anonymous / 11/10/2012 at 6:02am / United States / Love

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML

by shit.... / 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

by Squid / 11/07/2012 at 12:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing with my cat. I tried to put him on my stomach, but he refused to stay put. Ever since I lost weight, he won't lay with me or purr. I think my fat was the only thing he liked about me. FML

by creedonfied / 11/06/2012 at 3:27pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I started my new job as the only IT tech for my office. My first task: untangling the hundred mice the previous tech tied together for "fun". FML

by Anonymous / 11/06/2012 at 1:29pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

by Anonymous / 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my parents. My dad looked at him and said, "Nice outfit, but it's a little late for Halloween." Before I could intervene, my boyfriend said that joke had been done to death, to which my dad retorted, "Yeah, so has your mum." Instant fistfight. FML

by for fuck sake dad / 11/02/2012 at 7:50pm / Ireland (Limerick) / Love

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. I thought it was all going really well, until I looked up a minute or two in, only to be greeted by a stone-cold death glare and the words, "You really are an idiot, aren't you?" FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2012 at 3:46pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Intimacy

Today, after nearly a year of headaches and fuzzy vision, I went to the eye doctor. It turns out I've had my contacts in the wrong eyes for a year. FML

by Midnightpearls / 11/02/2012 at 11:39am / United States / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after losing twenty pounds to please my husband, the only comment I received was, "At least now only your personality sucks." FML

by 123alleyesonme / 11/02/2012 at 12:17am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, at my school they were having a carnival to raise money. One of the patrons suggested that if they wanted to make money, they should have people pledge money to make me cover my ugly face with a bag. The school got over $500, and I had to wear a bag. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2012 at 7:11pm / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous