About G3R : I'm 20 years old. I go to UAB and got hooked to FML a few of years ago after I ran across it on the iPhone app store. FML is now one of my favorite applications. All the stories crack me up.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, we were in the car with my puppy, who favours my sister. She had been sat on her lap for a while, when she stood up and climbed onto my lap. I was really pleased until she peed on me and then went straight back to my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24070) - you deserved it (2228)
On 09/17/2010 at 2:30am - misc - by PuppyPeeTimee. - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)
Today, my girlfriend's dad offered me $100 to break up with his daughter. I eagerly replied "no", but my girlfriend grabbed the money and said, "deal." FML
I agree, your life sucks (28641) - you deserved it (2428)
On 09/16/2010 at 9:30pm - love - by ccblock (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got a call from this girl I really like. Surprised, as I never get anything other than a text from her, I answered. All I heard were rustling sounds. She had pocket dialed me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20715) - you deserved it (3519)
On 09/16/2010 at 3:04am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, we were closing the restaurant early. I begin mopping as a couple walks in. The lady slips and falls, and to avoid a lawsuit, we offer them free food. After they left, I slipped on the freshly mopped kitchen floor with dishes in my hands. I didn't get free food. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15367) - you deserved it (5858)
On 09/15/2010 at 12:24am - work - by clumsyandhungry (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, after being with my boyfriend for seven years, he finally proposed. To another woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35887) - you deserved it (2766)
On 09/08/2010 at 3:46pm - love - by onthemarket (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I talked to my boyfriend's dad for the first time. One of the first things that he said to me was, "So, I hear you're a screamer." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31224) - you deserved it (5991)
On 08/31/2010 at 1:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML
I agree, your life sucks (33898) - you deserved it (13449)
On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, because I am pregnant with a weak bladder, I woke up with morning sickness and had to decide very quickly whether I wanted to vomit or pee in the toilet. I now have to clean the chunks off the wall. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24789) - you deserved it (3577)
On 08/24/2010 at 12:01pm - health - by prego - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I helped move my current boyfriend into his new dorm room. This would've been fine if I didn't have to do this while avoiding eye contact with my ex-boyfriend, who just happens to be my boyfriend's new roommate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23777) - you deserved it (3157)
On 08/23/2010 at 7:09pm - love - by DormHater (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, at a family dinner, my new husband compared deciding to marry me to buying a used car. Some of the similarites included looking under the hood and finding out how many previous owners there were. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22469) - you deserved it (5382)
On 08/21/2010 at 12:13am - intimacy - by carwife - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, right after I turned down an amazing job opportunity in another location, just so I could be with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24183) - you deserved it (12689)
On 08/15/2010 at 10:15pm - love - by crystalpistol (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was at the pool with two boys I baby sit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29908) - you deserved it (6861)
On 08/13/2010 at 12:14pm - kids - by qtpieo1 - United States (Ohio)
Today, I found out that if you fall asleep in church, people will think you're having a spiritual moment, and you'll wake up to ten people praying for you. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20933) - you deserved it (9269)
On 08/10/2010 at 8:14pm - misc - by Zippermania9 (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was supposed to take a test, but the professor didn't have it ready because he went to a concert last night. I sold my own tickets to that very concert in order to study for the test. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32474) - you deserved it (3095)
On 08/09/2010 at 1:44pm - misc - by goodstudent (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was in the car with my parents' friends. I was in the back with my window down when I felt something strange hit my ear. I then realized that the person sitting in front of me was picking their scab and throwing it out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21671) - you deserved it (1626)
On 08/09/2010 at 12:54pm - misc - by Scabs (woman) - United States (Utah)
Monday 17 June 2013
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