About G3R : I'm 20 years old. I go to UAB and got hooked to FML a few of years ago after I ran across it on the iPhone app store. FML is now one of my favorite applications. All the stories crack me up.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I found out I'm failing school. Why am I failing? Because I work 60 hours a week. Why do I work 60 hours a week? To pay for school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37926) - you deserved it (4049)
On 03/28/2013 at 10:26am - work - by school issues - United States
Today, I found out I'm failing school. Why am I failing? Because I work 60 hours a week. Why do I work 60 hours a week? To pay for school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37926) - you deserved it (4049)
On 03/28/2013 at 10:26am - work - by school issues - United States
Today, during a sex ed lesson, we were given a lecture on pregnancy and abortion from the school nurse. Throughout the session she kept repeating, "Of course, Sophie knows ALL about this." The nurse happens to know that my dad's a gynaecologist. That's not what everyone else in the year thinks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35541) - you deserved it (1612)
On 03/25/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by Soph (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)
Today, after much self-doubt and awkwardness, I learned that I look amazing in a little black dress. Now I have to figure out what I'm going to tell my wife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30594) - you deserved it (14287)
On 01/29/2013 at 12:28am - intimacy - by ohfuckwaffles (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18585) - you deserved it (33925)
On 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by chase (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, I waited over 30 minutes in freezing cold weather for my bus. When it finally arrived, I went to get on board, but slipped and fell on the icy ground. The driver waited a whole 2 seconds before snorting, "Ain't nobody got time for this shit", closing the doors, and driving off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33103) - you deserved it (2018)
On 01/24/2013 at 4:25pm - misc - by frozensolid (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26418) - you deserved it (1970)
On 07/12/2012 at 4:35pm - misc - by LetItRip - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41323) - you deserved it (5083)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my whole family piled into our station wagon just to watch my mom take part in an arm wrestling contest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15262) - you deserved it (2352)
On 09/01/2011 at 5:55am - misc - by Chris75 - United States (Oregon)
Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34137) - you deserved it (8522)
On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30780) - you deserved it (2409)
On 08/29/2011 at 4:33am - health - by SoupCanoe - United Kingdom (Hampshire)
Today, while paying for groceries, I opened my wallet to find that all my cash had been exchanged for Monopoly money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26981) - you deserved it (1969)
On 08/27/2011 at 8:38pm - money - by KayDayParade - United States
Today, after waiting 3 months, I finally got my wedding dress back from the dry-cleaners. The dry cleaning lasted longer than the marriage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28539) - you deserved it (7779)
On 08/26/2011 at 1:28am - love - by justmyluck - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (1786)
On 08/23/2011 at 3:14am - misc - by kykynevs - United States (Illinois)
Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20655) - you deserved it (6986)
On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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