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G3K0

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G3K0

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 774
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About G3K0 : The app doesn't seem to get my birthday right, no matter how much I re-enter it.. Oh well.

G3K0's page activity

Visits<b>lifelikedat</b> - the 10/02/2014 at 3:43am<b>theWulff</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 3:31pm<b>bassgod</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 7:16pm<b>Every1luvsfmls</b> - the 01/27/2013 at 5:58pm<b>mikeofthunder</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 7:27am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 7:18pm

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G3K0's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

#20521590
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45023) - you deserved it (7321)

On 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after more than a year of being single, I finally had sex. Unfortunately, it was only in a dream, and after we finished, he told me that I'm terrible in bed. Even my dream-lover is a dick. FML

#20510821
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35356) - you deserved it (5361)

On 02/17/2013 at 2:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Botswana (North-East)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

#20510302
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38643) - you deserved it (9277)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend finally said that she finally felt ready to have sex with me. It ended up being so terrible that I only managed to get some pleasure out of it when my mind drifted to the thought of going to Olive Garden later and eating some of their breadsticks. FML

#20508270
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38384) - you deserved it (9374)

On 02/15/2013 at 2:50pm - intimacy - by Acolyte of the Bacon God (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while trucking, I got stuck in traffic on a congested highway. After 15 minutes of mind-numbing boredom, I glanced down at the car beside me, only to witness the driver changing her tampon and flicking the old one onto the highway. I can't unsee this. FML

#20489402
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58203) - you deserved it (3531)

On 02/01/2013 at 8:01pm - intimacy - by thoughtidseenitall (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my hubby asked for a morning blow job, and I happily obliged. All was going great until he came and farted at the same time. I laughed and reassured him it was no big deal. He cried. FML

#20470929
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48681) - you deserved it (5860)

On 01/21/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by airbiscuit (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34689) - you deserved it (3397)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML

#20466497
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31311) - you deserved it (5374)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

#20466086
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35471) - you deserved it (3703)

On 01/18/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by Keastwood013 - United States

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

#20458937
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44345) - you deserved it (9220)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

#20453308
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39529) - you deserved it (6389)

On 01/11/2013 at 6:36am - love - by GiraffeLover - Australia

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34271) - you deserved it (2766)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my wife has the flu, while I have strep throat. We have a two-year-old toddler and have no clue as to who's more contagious and who should take care of her as to not get her sick. Yay for the entire day of surgical masks and Sesame Street. FML

#20448554
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26349) - you deserved it (2329)

On 01/08/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Curly (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

#20447496
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35834) - you deserved it (5176)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:44am - misc - by no sleep for me -

Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML

#20446350
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27234) - you deserved it (2846)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:09pm - love - by Sawarski - United States



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