Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

G0v3nat0r

Search for a member

G0v3nat0r

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1625
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

G0v3nat0r's page activity

Visits<b>plzent3r</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 11:51pm<b>_moden_</b> - the 07/01/2012 at 9:20am

G0v3nat0r's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of G0v3nat0r's badges

G0v3nat0r's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML

#17958269
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20990) - you deserved it (2125)

On 10/11/2011 at 5:43am - work - by Anony-moose (woman) - United States

Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML

#17953738
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34397) - you deserved it (24571)

On 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I forgot what I was doing while listening to a voicemail and started talking back to it. FML

#17918241
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19785) - you deserved it (9975)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:46am - misc - by xoccerplaya - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

#17913530
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32616) - you deserved it (7242)

On 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm - misc - by Pookaa (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses me more. FML

#17861962
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36825) - you deserved it (4411)

On 09/29/2011 at 5:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML

#17859546
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29664) - you deserved it (11174)

On 09/28/2011 at 10:28pm - love - by danthecomplicate - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was called a pervert. On a phone sex line. FML

#17857316
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16484) - you deserved it (50920)

On 09/28/2011 at 6:16pm - intimacy - by Hypocrisy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

#17854622
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31019) - you deserved it (5627)

On 09/28/2011 at 10:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML

#17853519
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34818) - you deserved it (2780)

On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

#17852902
316 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25582) - you deserved it (7784)

On 09/28/2011 at 12:55am - intimacy - by confused (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML

#17847323
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34517) - you deserved it (11530)

On 09/27/2011 at 11:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11889) - you deserved it (31001)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, my parents took away my laptop, TV, Xbox, and car all because I broke up with my girlfriend. They said when I patch things up with her, I can have my stuff back. FML

#17842672
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34251) - you deserved it (4805)

On 09/26/2011 at 9:10pm - love - by faded as shit - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

#17839732
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38082) - you deserved it (3134)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19869) - you deserved it (43630)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • Freaks's Illustrated FML
  • What's going on? Something weird is going on. I can feel it in my bones. Can't you? People are acting weird, as if they're short-fused all of a sudden. There's definitely…

Friday 1 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: