Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Fully

Search for a member

Fully

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2649
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Fully's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Fully's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a very crowded restaurant. Being really shy, I requested to sit in the corner, but instead they placed me in the center of the dinning area. I started to eat my food and got really spaced out. Suddenly I sneeze-farted and everyone turned to look at me. FML

#14008430
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25424) - you deserved it (6482)

On 11/28/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

#13975115
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23954) - you deserved it (6775)

On 11/25/2010 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore

Today, my grandma walked into my room and asked if the thing lying on my nightstand was a computer. I said ''Grandma, that's a clock.'' After staring at me, confused for a few seconds, she then farted, and left my room. FML

#13949092
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40429) - you deserved it (5368)

On 11/23/2010 at 12:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300 pound man walked out, shook his head, and said "I'm sorry" to me. FML

#13675906
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32330) - you deserved it (3127)

On 11/01/2010 at 3:39pm - misc - by mr_p - United States (Illinois)

Today, I realized that it wasn't my science partner that smelled bad, it was me. How? The guy I have a crush on handed me a stick of deodorant and said, "Please use it." FML

#12764929
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11066) - you deserved it (31615)

On 08/27/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by Oops (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend from the top of a bungee jumping platform at an amusement park. I yelled out, "WILL YOU MARRY ME?" from the platform, pointing her out. Turns out, I was pointing at the wrong girl. My girlfriend was very angry and ran away when the wrong girl yelled, "Yes!" FML

#12757529
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33062) - you deserved it (14078)

On 08/26/2010 at 4:06pm - love - by Ido (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was enjoying a nice shower in the morning. While I was massaging the shampoo out of my hair, I saw the gardener walking past my bathroom window, yelling "Good morning" and waving in my direction. My left boob politely waved back at him. FML

#12726164
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13474) - you deserved it (24122)

On 08/24/2010 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by AlexaSt2611 (woman) - Paraguay (Central)

Today, because I am pregnant with a weak bladder, I woke up with morning sickness and had to decide very quickly whether I wanted to vomit or pee in the toilet. I now have to clean the chunks off the wall. FML

#12719828
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30041) - you deserved it (4715)

On 08/24/2010 at 12:01pm - health - by prego - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I went shopping with my Mom. I ran into my crush. A school dance is soon and he WAS just about to ask something but my mom glanced over and yelled "TAMPONS OR PADS, SWEETIE?!" He then changed his question to "Haha, so which?" And before I could say a word, my mother answered for me. FML

#12695884
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36790) - you deserved it (3161)

On 08/23/2010 at 2:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I popped a zit and I went to put my acne medicine on it. It's in a clear bottle with a blue cap, just like the nearby nailpolish remover. I grabbed the wrong one. FML

#12685763
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23412) - you deserved it (12971)

On 08/22/2010 at 5:20pm - misc - by inseriouspain (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. According to his Facebook, he had a new girlfriend 16 seconds later. FML

#12682648
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33203) - you deserved it (3081)

On 08/22/2010 at 1:02pm - love - by mollyeyers - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, after a costly fix for my brakes that failed a while back as I was going down a hill, I found a $130 bill in the mail attached to a speed camera photo of me shitting myself. FML

#12657021
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26010) - you deserved it (3549)

On 08/21/2010 at 1:25am - money - by car (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dad decided to take me to play golf to relieve the stress of recovering from a bad concussion. While teaching me to swing, he hit me in the head. FML

#12655415
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27706) - you deserved it (2814)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:05am - health - by meowcat101 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was on the toilet, when my Mom thought it would be a fun idea to barge in, take a picture of me, post it on Facebook, and tag me. FML

#12650265
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33746) - you deserved it (3876)

On 08/20/2010 at 7:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, one of my cousins offered to sell me his mac for a low price. When I got it, I realized it was an old toshiba painted white with an apple sticker on it. My cousin still insists it's a mac. FML

#12612052
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15939) - you deserved it (27181)

On 08/18/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by roflcopter (man) - United States (New Jersey)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: