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FuhrerBurg

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FuhrerBurg

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  • Number of visits : 58482
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Inception

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The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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FuhrerBurg's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend whom I'm crazy about broke up with me out of the blue. After pleading with her unsuccessfully, I called my mom for comfort and advice. She informed me that my dog had died. FML

#14461663
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39455) - you deserved it (2712)

On 01/04/2011 at 9:49am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my dad told me he had been seeing someone for a while and has decided to marry her. When I met her, her son looked familiar. I lost my virginity to him. FML

#14460417
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44607) - you deserved it (5369)

On 01/04/2011 at 5:56am - intimacy - by LoveMyNewBro -

Today, I took my daughter to the library instead of the pool. I sat her on the counter and, while I reached for my library card, she turned to the librarian and said "We didn't go to the pool today because Mum has hairy legs." FML

#14459549
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24386) - you deserved it (11937)

On 01/04/2011 at 3:05am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I discovered after four hours of vomiting that it is very much possible to vomit so hard you can't help but shit in your trousers. My boyfriend is currently staying over, too. FML

#14458988
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25006) - you deserved it (2509)

On 01/04/2011 at 2:12am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

#14453942
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25670) - you deserved it (2204)

On 01/03/2011 at 7:56pm - work - by cain001 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

#14453942
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25670) - you deserved it (2204)

On 01/03/2011 at 7:56pm - work - by cain001 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while changing my clothes, my 3 year old daughter informed me that I looked like a zebra. Noticing my shocked face, she tried comforting me by telling me I was a pretty zebra because I was a purple zebra. She was talking about my stretch marks. FML

#14451100
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31439) - you deserved it (4167)

On 01/03/2011 at 1:56pm - kids - by jenabp - United States (Arizona)

Today, while changing my clothes, my 3 year old daughter informed me that I looked like a zebra. Noticing my shocked face, she tried comforting me by telling me I was a pretty zebra because I was a purple zebra. She was talking about my stretch marks. FML

#14451100
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31439) - you deserved it (4167)

On 01/03/2011 at 1:56pm - kids - by jenabp - United States (Arizona)

Today, it was my first day back to school after break. I wasn't feeling well, but I decided to go anyway. I threw up in the hallway and shit myself at the same time. I waited in the office for my dad to come and get me for almost an hour while wearing dirty underwear. FML

#14450689
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31178) - you deserved it (4677)

On 01/03/2011 at 12:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while sitting next to the cute guy in my English class, I had to sneeze. I turned away from him and sneezed into my arm. My long hair got in the way and I accidentally shot a huge snot rocket into my hair. I spent the rest of the class trying to get it out without him noticing. FML

#14450678
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22954) - you deserved it (4436)

On 01/03/2011 at 12:17pm - misc - by klyoung5 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went for a drive with my boyfriend and his dad. His dad was kind enough to point out at every opportunity girls "that would be better for him than me". FML

#14449483
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27137) - you deserved it (2693)

On 01/03/2011 at 6:37am - love - by anon. (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I put on a lacy dress with nothing underneath and walked nonchalantly into the living room. My husband took one look at me, let out a heavy sigh and said "right now?" FML

#14448296
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34831) - you deserved it (4382)

On 01/03/2011 at 3:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my beautiful engagement ring is a remake of the late Princess Diana's engagement ring. I also found out my fiancé bought it from an infomercial, for $19.95. FML

#14447328
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32200) - you deserved it (6931)

On 01/03/2011 at 1:52am - love - by puggles (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband's old fraternity brother came to visit. He fell out of his car, puked, then passed out drunk in our driveway. We got him to the bathroom where he fell asleep. He woke up at 4am, wandered around the house naked, pooped in my trash can, then passed out again. FML

#14445248
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30204) - you deserved it (3526)

On 01/02/2011 at 11:14pm - misc - by Kristin (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realised it takes me longer to take a dump than it does to have sex with my boyfriend. I also realised taking a dump is more satisfying. FML

#14442840
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35102) - you deserved it (5841)

On 01/02/2011 at 8:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)



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