Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FuhrerBurg

Online | Search for a member

FuhrerBurg

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 37290
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

FuhrerBurg's page activity

Visits<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 11:03pm<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 3:01pm<b>Replicakes</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 3:25pm<b>IAmJad</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 1:31pm<b>AriaRose3</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 6:46pm<b>unworldlyalex</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 12:07am<b>MathewBlack</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 3:24pm<b>Poppy8127</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 4:58pm<b>lemon_lime741</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 11:34am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 9:58pm<b>cosicosei</b> - the 03/17/2014 at 4:23am<b>momsquared</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 12:32pm<b>elmatador615</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 1:18am<b>xgardian</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 12:27am<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 01/06/2014 at 2:24pm<b>TheRoyalDog</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 9:24pm<b>Haxie</b> - the 12/27/2013 at 7:42am<b>RockNRollAndrew</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 1:28pm

FuhrerBurg's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of FuhrerBurg's badges

FuhrerBurg's favorite FMLs

Today, a hooker refused my custom. According to her, "Even whores have standards." FML

#17548776
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19985) - you deserved it (41679)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML

#17547922
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33678) - you deserved it (3242)

On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)

Today, it was my birthday, and my kids gave me my car keys I had "lost" a week ago. FML

#17547713
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28415) - you deserved it (2884)

On 08/22/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by rene - United States (Texas)

Today, I watched my neighbor bring his dogs into my yard to let them empty their piss-pipes and poop-chutes. He does this twice a day. I put a "cut it out" sign up. His dogs peed on the sign and knocked it down. My lawn is a landmine of dog logs and I don't know what to do, besides installing actual landmines. FML

Today, while at my boxing gym, an old man came inside and did the oddest drunk dance in order to serenade me. I'm a fighter and fine with taking punches to the face, but froze in terror at the sight of this. FML

#17545368
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21220) - you deserved it (2937)

On 08/22/2011 at 3:44am - misc - by No Action Fighter - United States (California)

Today, I was with my boyfriend and I said that I was self-conscious of my acne. He told me that only one of my zits was noticeable and that it wasn't so bad. In fact he said it looked cool, like a bullet wound or something "awesome" like that. FML

#17544158
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26277) - you deserved it (4812)

On 08/22/2011 at 12:58am - health - by collball22 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML

#17543334
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16721) - you deserved it (32279)

On 08/21/2011 at 11:44pm - intimacy - by datingmrpicky (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

#17538600
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27610) - you deserved it (5489)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm - animals - by xXangelaXx - United States

Today, I'm a host at a restaurant. We had a birthday party for a couple of 15 year old boys and their friends. I went to clean the bathroom at the end of my shift and discovered cake everywhere, including all over the urinal. They were even nice enough to draw a smiley on the mirror with icing. FML

#17535698
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24101) - you deserved it (2055)

On 08/21/2011 at 3:35am - work - by cakehater - United States (Arkansas)

Today, over a year on from my parents telling me my dog had died, I went to the shelter to volunteer, and saw my old dog. FML

#17534903
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45639) - you deserved it (2191)

On 08/21/2011 at 1:51am - animals - by Dogless - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I finally realized the reason my son's grades have been dropping so much. Every time I drop him off at his tutor's house, they play Call of Duty until I pick him up. FML

#17534893
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32119) - you deserved it (5360)

On 08/21/2011 at 1:48am - kids - by callofdutyhater - United States (California)

Today, I learned the hard way that when a pierced, tattooed, and otherwise extremely stereotypical biker chick jokingly threatens to find you and beat you up if you don't call her back after a one-night stand, she's not actually joking. FML

#17531904
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13252) - you deserved it (43983)

On 08/20/2011 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by owmyhead (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML

#17531478
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26529) - you deserved it (2150)

On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of two years confessed that she'd gotten married. But not to worry: she only did it for "tax reasons." FML

Today, my boss called me into his office and bitched me out for a good half hour for my attitude to our customers. Apparently I always look pissed off and sound sarcastic. That's just my face at rest. FML

#17530831
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23386) - you deserved it (4937)

On 08/20/2011 at 5:36pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Solihull)



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: