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FuhrerBurg

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FuhrerBurg
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10832
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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FuhrerBurg's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally learned why the application of lasers, acids, liquid nitrogen and witchcraft never did any good on the huge warts on my hands. Apparently, it's a genetic disease and not a virus. For unknown reasons, I've recently grown the normal viral kind too. On my tongue. FML

Today, my wife figured that a good foreplay move would be to rub MY underwear in MY face. FML

#15675353
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31493) - you deserved it (8834)

On 04/07/2011 at 1:19am - intimacy - by 1337fade (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I finally found out what the weird sour smell that's been in my dorm room for a while is. My roommate's sweat. FML

#15673265
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23665) - you deserved it (2442)

On 04/06/2011 at 11:12pm - misc - by thatstinks - Iceland

Today, I got fired from my job. I caught a customer taking pictures up my skirt, and my boss fired me for calling the police and "making a big deal out of it". FML

#15669664
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36859) - you deserved it (6431)

On 04/06/2011 at 7:57pm - work - by PsychoSarah (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that an unmentioned side effect of my new medication is body zits. I now have zits on my neck, my ear, and inside my nose. FML

#15666194
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26604) - you deserved it (328)

On 04/06/2011 at 3:31pm - health - by ewwww (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I subbed for a first grade class. They were releasing butterflies. Butterflies scare me shitless. A bunch of 7 year-olds watched as I screamed hysterically when one landed on me. FML

#15661118
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18424) - you deserved it (31301)

On 04/06/2011 at 2:22am - animals - by mottephobe - United States (Utah)

Today, I subbed for a first grade class. They were releasing butterflies. Butterflies scare me shitless. A bunch of 7 year-olds watched as I screamed hysterically when one landed on me. FML

#15661118
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18424) - you deserved it (31301)

On 04/06/2011 at 2:22am - animals - by mottephobe - United States (Utah)

Today, I subbed for a first grade class. They were releasing butterflies. Butterflies scare me shitless. A bunch of 7 year-olds watched as I screamed hysterically when one landed on me. FML

#15661118
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18424) - you deserved it (31301)

On 04/06/2011 at 2:22am - animals - by mottephobe - United States (Utah)

Today, I was prescribed anti-anxiety medication due to the high level of stress that I experience at my job. Unfortunately, I cannot afford the medication because I do not make enough money at said job. FML

#15658999
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27149) - you deserved it (3604)

On 04/05/2011 at 11:26pm - money - by Username -

Today, I wore my cheerleading uniform to my boyfriend's house. He was a nerd in high school and mentioned a fantasy about hooking up with a cheerleader. I started acting sassy and a little mean, figuring he would enjoy a more realistic experience. Apparently not, because he started to cry. FML

#15658091
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24549) - you deserved it (44278)

On 04/05/2011 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by oc_cheergirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was cleaning my bathroom, and accidentally spilled bleach, ruining my shower curtain, rugs, and towels. While attempting to wipe up the bleach, I knocked over a bottle of shower cleaner. It read, "WARNING: DO NOT MIX WITH BLEACH." I still can't go in the house. FML

#15657358
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26236) - you deserved it (9509)

On 04/05/2011 at 9:52pm - misc - by troublewithbleach (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML

#15651710
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45906) - you deserved it (4702)

On 04/05/2011 at 2:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my 3 year old daughter decided to put black nail polish over the webcam lens on my laptop because "It wasn't all black, so I decided to fix it." FML

#15650612
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28802) - you deserved it (5215)

On 04/05/2011 at 12:48pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that our neighbors told almost everyone on our street that I was mentally handicapped. All this time I wasn't sure why they would speak slowly and loudly at me. Now they won't believe me when I tell them I'm a 4.0 GPA student. FML

#15650544
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29894) - you deserved it (3016)

On 04/05/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by Imslow (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a band concert with 500 other people. The song they were performing stopped, and I loved it so much I stood up and clapped. Everyone stared, while I slowly realized the song wasn't over. FML

#15649522
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10145) - you deserved it (28728)

On 04/05/2011 at 10:06am - misc - by RedFace (woman) - United States



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