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FuhrerBurg

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FuhrerBurg
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10732
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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FuhrerBurg's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching my cousin shoot at targets on hay bales with his plastic pellet BB gun. After my sister asked him if it would hurt to be shot with one, my cousin smiled at her and said, "Ask your sister" as he shot me in the leg. I think my screaming was obvious enough. It hurts. FML

#17995977
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23849) - you deserved it (2608)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by ThanksChris (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was watching my cousin shoot at targets on hay bales with his plastic pellet BB gun. After my sister asked him if it would hurt to be shot with one, my cousin smiled at her and said, "Ask your sister" as he shot me in the leg. I think my screaming was obvious enough. It hurts. FML

#17995977
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23849) - you deserved it (2608)

On 10/16/2011 at 3:06am - misc - by ThanksChris (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my mom left for a business trip. Thinking it was a good time to throw a party, I mass messaged everyone on my contact list. I thought it was going to be a success. The problem with this? My mom is on my contacts list. She replied "I'll be home in an hour. You're grounded." FML

#17992894
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6208) - you deserved it (56214)

On 10/15/2011 at 8:47pm - misc - by mass message (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was kicked out of the mall along with a bunch of my friends, sworn at by the security guards, and personally escorted all the way to the sidewalk, only to find out we'd been mistaken for another group of people. FML

#17992397
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24836) - you deserved it (1983)

On 10/15/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by -- - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was kicked out of the mall along with a bunch of my friends, sworn at by the security guards, and personally escorted all the way to the sidewalk, only to find out we'd been mistaken for another group of people. FML

#17992397
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24836) - you deserved it (1983)

On 10/15/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by -- - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I learned that when I got my driver's permit, I agreed to be the designated driver for my family. FML

#17990354
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19936) - you deserved it (3424)

On 10/15/2011 at 2:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my brother put pepper spray on my toilet paper. FML

#17987492
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37273) - you deserved it (2637)

On 10/15/2011 at 3:18am - misc - by Ca13b - United States (Oregon)

Today, my balls were stepped on while I was taking a nap in the park. The man said he didn't see me lying there. I was wearing a neon orange jacket. FML

#17986528
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24984) - you deserved it (9879)

On 10/15/2011 at 12:33am - misc - by dak-rod423 (man) - United States (California)

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

#17984134
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23791) - you deserved it (4596)

On 10/14/2011 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by myasshurts - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

#17982026
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31567) - you deserved it (2135)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

#17982026
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31567) - you deserved it (2135)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, I had to escort some dumbass teenager from Home Depot after I found him masturbating in one of the model washrooms. FML

#17982026
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31567) - you deserved it (2135)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved

Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML

#17981940
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38400) - you deserved it (3846)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States

Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML

#17981925
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22591) - you deserved it (1500)

On 10/14/2011 at 12:09pm - misc - by francesa_loca - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my dad used the stove to boil water. Unfortunately, he turned the wrong burner on, setting the smoke alarm off. What's worse was the smell of burning plastic that came from the coffeemaker being melted down. It's been over an hour, and my eyes still burn like hell when I walk into the kitchen. FML

#17980981
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16625) - you deserved it (1896)

On 10/14/2011 at 6:36am - misc - by cnkk07 - United States



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