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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, I had a meeting at work with my board of directors for a potential promotion. When one of them told a joke, I politely let out an amused snort. Then, I noticed my director's white shirt and tie covered in red splatter. I nose bled all over the director of my company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42140) - you deserved it (3103)
On 06/08/2009 at 2:51pm - work - by Marie (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I was at my friends house. It was dark and downpouring so I couldnt see as I was backing out of his driveway. I made it out, but then my phone went off, scaring me, and I accidentally hit the gas pedal, hitting his neighbor's parked car. Turns out he called to warn me to watch out for it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31429) - you deserved it (4712)
On 06/08/2009 at 9:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was at a 21st birthday party. It got to the bit where they blow out the candles and the girl hosting blew out her candles. While she was blowing I whispered to the fella next to me, "That's not the only thing she'll be blowing tonight". The guy next to me was her dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11280) - you deserved it (65406)
On 06/08/2009 at 6:39am - intimacy - by baller (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I had to tell a girl I liked she couldn't sleep over because I live with my parents. I'm 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21562) - you deserved it (58067)
On 06/08/2009 at 3:32am - intimacy - by levit (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to tell a girl I liked she couldn't sleep over because I live with my parents. I'm 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21562) - you deserved it (58067)
On 06/08/2009 at 3:32am - intimacy - by levit (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I woke up hungover and thirsty, I found a glass of water next to the sink, filled it up with more water, chugged it and went back to bed. I woke up an hour later to my best friend telling me she thought she lost her contacts. They were in a glass next to the sink. I ate her contacts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25070) - you deserved it (28793)
Today, I locked myself out of my truck for the first time. While trying to unlock it, it started to rain. After half an hour, I successfully unlocked the door and then drove over my book bag, which I had placed underneath the car to keep it out of the rain. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28416) - you deserved it (11685)
On 06/07/2009 at 5:49pm - misc - by no - United States (Michigan)
Today, I walked to Starbucks. On the way a homeless guy asked me for change and I lied and said I had no money. On my way back, Strawberry Frappuccino in hand, the same guy recognized me. He followed me for 3 blocks, swearing and yelling at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20956) - you deserved it (41647)
On 06/07/2009 at 4:46pm - misc - by Jebus (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62422) - you deserved it (6822)
On 06/07/2009 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by Person (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my crush was walking up to me and I put my earphones in, playing hard to get. When I heard him say something about a date I take an earphone out and say, "Oh, I didn't see you there!" His response, "They're not connected to anything," holds up the end of my earphones and walks away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7469) - you deserved it (87818)
On 06/07/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to a huge party. My ex boyfriend was there who I still have feelings for, so I decided to make him jealous by making out with the really drunk guy next to me. While we were making out, he threw up in my mouth and all over me. Everybody found it hysterical including my ex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11702) - you deserved it (67628)
On 06/07/2009 at 9:50am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Free State)
Today, I was sitting in class when the most popular girl in my grade came up to me holding birthday invitation cards. I've never been invited to a birthday party, so I was so excited when she handed me a card only to hear her say, "Mary is on your bus, will you give this to her?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (53288) - you deserved it (3139)
On 06/07/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by loner (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was hard at work cleaning up from a party I had while my parents were out for the night. Not a bottle of beer or a red cup was left for them to find. However, my parents did find two of my friends in their bedroom, still passed out and naked from beer and sex last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14764) - you deserved it (57549)
On 06/07/2009 at 7:41am - intimacy - by zep (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47580) - you deserved it (4997)
On 06/07/2009 at 5:23am - misc - by apparentlyunattractive (woman) - United States
Today, was my graduation party. My birthday was about a week ago so my parents combined the presents. I thought it would be something big so I hinted for a new TV. I got a snuggie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51815) - you deserved it (3563)
On 06/07/2009 at 12:49am - money - by AllyCat (man) - United States (Virginia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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