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Fuerto203

Offline (the 08/25/2014 at 11:42am) | Search for a member

Fuerto203

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  • Number of visits : 320
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Fuerto203's page activity

Visits<b>hexo21</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 2:21am<b>fzzt2</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 12:55pm

Fuerto203's FML badges

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Fuerto203's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

#17508595
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37701) - you deserved it (3003)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:38am - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bexley)

Today, I started to fall in love with my wife again. We are in the middle of a divorce. FML

#17457372
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37498) - you deserved it (16341)

On 08/13/2011 at 3:25am - love - by badass - United States

Today, I saw my brother's pregnant girlfriend smoking. Disgusted, I asked him why he didn't just stab her in the uterus and get it over with. He laughed like it was a joke, then cussed because he spilled his cereal. He's more concerned about spilled cereal than having a brain-damaged child. FML

#17424744
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32430) - you deserved it (9045)

On 08/10/2011 at 12:46am - health - by auntoftheyear - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I got into an argument with a militantly feminist co-worker of mine. She threw several vulgar insults at me and debased the entire male gender before storming off. I'd only asked if she needed help while she was doing a crossword. FML

#17284232
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29209) - you deserved it (4555)

On 07/28/2011 at 6:51am - work - by Rick - United States (Indiana)

Today, my aunt gave my cat aspirin because when she touched his nose he had a 'fever'. I came home to a dead cat. FML

#16495613
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54054) - you deserved it (3681)

On 06/04/2011 at 7:22am - animals - by Clumsyblonde22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

#15261290
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45883) - you deserved it (8715)

On 03/10/2011 at 10:08am - intimacy - by Anon (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was out skating with a guy I really like. I put on my best moves, to impress him. I ended up slicing his lip open with my skate mid-jump. His lip is now wired shut by twelve stitches. FML

#15176511
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15158) - you deserved it (31845)

On 03/02/2011 at 4:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, while having sex, I found out that I'm so flexible that when I bend over backwards, the backs of my knees can touch my shoulders. My boyfriend is now extremely jealous and is debating about breaking up with me. Even I don't get it. FML

#15113643
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43651) - you deserved it (4209)

On 02/25/2011 at 11:03am - intimacy - by inder (woman) - United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent)

Today, I felt like adding my real middle name to my facebook name to make it look more professional. It was denied because they didn't feel it was a legitimate request. Minutes later, someone with the name of "Galactic Toast" friend requested me. FML

#14048289
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27072) - you deserved it (3393)

On 12/01/2010 at 2:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML

#13592451
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40368) - you deserved it (3872)

On 10/25/2010 at 6:09pm - animals - by sly - United States (Texas)

Today, I received two cards in the mail for my late husband for his birthday. He has been dead for four years now, and the cards were from our two children, who live several states away. This is the fourth time it's happened, and neither of them answer my calls. Ever. FML

#13514836
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41125) - you deserved it (3209)

On 10/19/2010 at 6:58pm - kids - by widow - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment, when I came across a lacy black thong in the laundry. When confronted, he swore it was his. I don't know what's worse, the possibility that another woman left it there, or the idea that my boyfriend owns and wears women's lingerie. FML

#9037172
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26021) - you deserved it (2663)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:14am - love - by botharebad (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was eating pizza with my girlfriend. She got sauce on the corner of her mouth so I tried to be sexy and lick it off. It wasn't sauce, it was a cluster of zits. FML

#8889427
280 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18762) - you deserved it (35537)

On 03/07/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by choldcreations - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I found out my cousin - who suffers from bipolar disorder - shot herself in the chest and has only a 20 percent chance of living. I told my boyfriend, while crying, and he held me for a few minutes. As soon as I got quiet, he pulled out his iPhone and started playing a shooter game. FML

#8364770
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37123) - you deserved it (3744)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:30am - love - by lynn (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend's crazy ex, who let herself in with her old key. She screamed at me to get out of "her" bed, snatched "her" blanket off of my body, and finally dragged the bed itself out the door. I was still in it. FML



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