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Fuck_The_Police

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Fuck_The_Police

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2254
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

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Fuck_The_Police's page activity

Visits<b>Captain_Brittain</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 6:25pm<b>roll_fukng_tide</b> - the 03/26/2010 at 10:27pm<b>hatehatehatehate</b> - the 07/25/2009 at 11:46pm<b>blargity</b> - the 07/21/2009 at 1:40am<b>xEmGai</b> - the 07/13/2009 at 2:28am<b>whyowhy26</b> - the 07/11/2009 at 4:44pm<b>DizzyDemon0</b> - the 07/11/2009 at 1:46pm<b>FYLOL</b> - the 06/23/2009 at 1:16pm

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Fuck_The_Police's favorite FMLs

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58358) - you deserved it (15060)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I fell asleep in my last period class. When I woke up my teacher said "you missed your bus". I grabbed all my stuff and ran out the room. My class mates were standing outside the class laughing. We still had an hour left in class. FML

#5145727
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8974) - you deserved it (53056)

On 09/09/2009 at 8:32am - misc - by Victor (man) - United States

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

#5110537
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34263) - you deserved it (5914)

On 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm - work - by CMANIA (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking on a busy street. I saw this beautiful blonde walking across the street and a car was coming. I wanted to be like in the movies where the guy pushes the girl out of the way so she doesn't get hit. I accidentally pushed her the wrong way. Right into the car. FML

#5107087
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11603) - you deserved it (70416)

On 09/07/2009 at 3:21pm - misc - by ilovefootball (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my best friend thought it would be funny push me off my bike. He thought it was even funnier when the paramedic accidentally dropped me. FML

#4983911
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43012) - you deserved it (2613)

On 09/01/2009 at 8:04pm - health - by Misterhippo (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed "holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML

#4981586
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12019) - you deserved it (40498)

On 09/01/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by becca1417 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML

#4962487
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47463) - you deserved it (4104)

On 08/31/2009 at 9:12pm - love - by SaMike (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, while emailing my very young, attractive teacher to ask a question, my hand slipped. Too bad you can't unsend emails that say "Can we meet after school some time? I have some thongs I'd like to discuss with you." FML

#4956234
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36645) - you deserved it (10146)

On 08/31/2009 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

#4945684
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45270) - you deserved it (13687)

On 08/31/2009 at 1:18am - work - by Timmah (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, on a plane I was showing my brother the life jackets kept under the seat. After pulling on what I thought was the lifejacket, I then realized that they were kept in the arm rest to my right and for the last five minutes I had been pulling on the foot of the man who was sitting behind me. FML

#4826792
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8809) - you deserved it (35944)

On 08/26/2009 at 12:28am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

#4566458
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48956) - you deserved it (8652)

On 08/16/2009 at 3:05am - health - by irony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I fractured my knuckle at the gym. My girlfriend offered to drive me to Urgent Care. As I threw my gym bag in the car, my keys flew out of the bag's pocket and hit her in the face. I spent the whole afternoon getting dirty looks from nurses because of my broken hand and her black eye. FML

#4523157
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57122) - you deserved it (4738)

On 08/14/2009 at 10:26am - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I bought a freezer mug that looks like it's full of water. I've been playing tricks on my friends by throwing the empty cup at them. After doing this a few dozen times, my 83 year-old mother came to visit. I played the same trick on her. The joke's on me. My Dad filled the cup. FML

#4495233
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8203) - you deserved it (60941)

On 08/13/2009 at 3:27am - misc - by oldtexas (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my cousin came over. I left my iPod on shuffle in the room we were in as I left to go to the bathroom. When I came back she was jamming out to "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. She won't stop singing it and her mom is coming over to pick her up in an hour. She's 4. FML

#4463161
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14054) - you deserved it (41709)

On 08/11/2009 at 11:34pm - kids - by SomeDJ (man) - United States (Arizona)



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