Fruitmonster2

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Fruitmonster2

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 4 October 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5448
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Fruitmonster2 : Just ask me!

Fruitmonster2's page activity

Visits<b>Lorenzo1102</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 6:15am<b>xJudii</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 9:37pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 11:44am<b>123catman</b> - the 07/04/2013 at 7:16pm<b>JohnBoyFsYL</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 5:10pm<b>LeslieAustin</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 12:21pm<b>lazyfoo92</b> - the 03/18/2013 at 11:30am<b>ronnie220</b> - the 01/08/2013 at 4:26pm<b>IsjnI</b> - the 12/18/2012 at 2:07am<b>stewy133</b> - the 12/17/2012 at 7:01pm<b>KingDingALing</b> - the 10/28/2012 at 9:06am<b>egc573</b> - the 07/16/2012 at 6:08pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 01/02/2012 at 10:40pm<b>Ian20</b> - the 11/08/2011 at 12:20am<b>Epikouros</b> - the 11/07/2011 at 9:32am<b>jayson13</b> - the 11/05/2011 at 8:05pm<b>youtubetre</b> - the 11/05/2011 at 7:22am<b>Cairo_</b> - the 11/03/2011 at 9:37pm

Fruitmonster2's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Fruitmonster2's badges

Fruitmonster2's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on my way home when I saw a cop hiding behind a Budget truck. I immediately slowed down and prayed that he wouldn't give me a ticket. Then I realized I was walking. FML

by kas / 04/30/2009 at 1:41pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

by anonymous / 04/21/2009 at 1:42am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, for the first time ever, a woman saw my penis. I am 30 years old. The woman was my doctor. She snorted to cover a laugh and apologized. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2009 at 5:40pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I was in IKEA, furniture shopping with my dad. He was looking at one couch that was particularly small. I said "dad that couch is for like a midget." I look over to see a midget looking at me, sitting on the same couch in a different color. He definitely heard me. FML

by Nikki / 04/04/2009 at 11:40pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2009 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

by Mason_Jayson / 03/22/2009 at 3:45pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

by Noname / 03/12/2009 at 6:08pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was a TA for a history class and the class was taking a test. About halfway through, I noticed one kid had a small piece of paper in his hand. I ran up the row, grabbed his test, and ripped it into four pieces. Then I took the note from him. It said "I believe in you, -Mom." FML

by Noname / 02/26/2009 at 10:30am / United States (Michigan) / Work