Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 11/24/2015 at 7:29pm) | Search for a member
About Frenchtony : Hi I'm Antoine, I'm French and I'm currently in college studying law. I enjoy traveling, playing guitar, photography, hanging out...
That's about it, please feel free NOT to message me anytime, unless you want to talk about:
-The end of American Psycho (book cause the end of the movie is less opened to discussion)
-The Big Lebowski
-Your ping-pong skills
-Bob Dylan Neil Young, the Tallest Man on Earth or Leonard Cohen
-Your nice little scarlet drawl.
-Any book by Steinbeck
-Your vacations, specially if you've been to Alderaan
These restrictions do not apply if you are a girl from Germany, England, Japan, Switzerland, Peru or Botswana.
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
I like your style
You've liked someone. How cute!
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML
Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking to stay a while. It turns out he insulted someone online and gave his address in case they wanted to fight him. They accepted the offer, and so my son's imaginary Muay Thai skills went AWOL, along with his testicles. FML
Today, I found thousands of ants in a secret nest in an unused corner of my apartment. They were feeding on the baking mix I forgot in a box from moving two months ago, and the queen has been laying her eggs on my wireless router. FML
Today, I went to go use an automatic cart in Walmart because I broke my hip in January. They were all being used by morbidly obese people throughout the store. I asked a manager if she could get me one, but apparently their weight issues are more impeding than my broken hip. FML
Today, my boss called me Ashley. My name doesn't even start with an A. I even wear a name tag. You would think after nearly four years, your boss would remember your name. Every time he speaks to me, it's a different name. FML
Today, I had a job interview at 9:00am. I left at around 8:30am, and as soon as I got in the car to drive to the interview, I checked my phone again, and it said 10:33. My boyfriend had decided to change the time on my clock as a "joke." FML
Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML
Friday 27 November 2015