Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Freedom92

Offline (the 08/19/2014 at 11:06pm) | Search for a member

Freedom92

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 23 July 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 538
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Freedom92 : Just looking for reasons to laugh. Here I am.:)

Freedom92's page activity

Visits<b>joshuaz1990</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 10:30pm<b>trex83</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 7:55am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 2:48pm<b>speakersboom</b> - the 11/29/2013 at 1:02pm<b>moksha</b> - the 04/09/2013 at 6:26am<b>princessEll</b> - the 03/21/2013 at 2:25pm<b>crimsonlover4</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 1:57pm

Freedom92's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of Freedom92's badges

Freedom92's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a baseball game with my girlfriend's dad. I got a boner when they sang the anthem, because that's what I sing in my head when having sex with his daughter so I last longer. FML

#21240482
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37752) - you deserved it (13499)

On 08/18/2014 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by embarrassed - United States (New York)

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45044) - you deserved it (4380)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I made fun of a girl singing passionately along to a song on her radio while in traffic next to me. She decided that her chocolate milkshake would make a good addition to my brand new seat covers. FML

#21237592
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14322) - you deserved it (67707)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:54pm - misc - by oops - United States (California)

Today, it was a hot day and a woman walking in front of me collapsed. I helped her up, and I called an ambulance while she laid down. While we waited, two teenage girls walked past and I heard one say to the other, "I love how this city just lets people tan wherever". FML

#21237053
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36970) - you deserved it (2546)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - New Zealand

Today, my professor told everyone that he thinks all med students should be required to get a catheter and an enema at least once in their lives so they can relate to their patients, saying, "Gentlemen, it might change your lives." FML

#21236595
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32107) - you deserved it (5654)

On 08/13/2014 at 11:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36361) - you deserved it (22134)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML

#21234756
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34442) - you deserved it (2993)

On 08/11/2014 at 10:18am - work - by mcmanager - United States (California)

Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML

#21229021
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42057) - you deserved it (4175)

On 08/04/2014 at 1:42am - health - by Ew?Really? (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my elderly mother explained that, "I don't need my glasses to drive, I just need them to see." FML

#21228755
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35003) - you deserved it (2497)

On 08/03/2014 at 8:47pm - misc - by scared - Canada

Today, my neighbour casually mentioned that he sold my car's GPS that I'd let him borrow. He figured I wouldn't be needing it anymore since I lost my license. FML

#21228738
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36214) - you deserved it (4499)

On 08/03/2014 at 8:19pm - money - by lovethyneighbour - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I painted my nails in the car. After I finished, I stuck my hands out the window to let them dry. When I pulled my hands back in there were live bugs stuck in my nail polish. FML

#21228488
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22757) - you deserved it (44261)

On 08/03/2014 at 2:49pm - misc - by ew - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to give a video presentation. My video was on animal abuse, but I somehow played a video of myself singing Britney Spears in my room. FML

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48218) - you deserved it (20947)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was pulled over for distracted driving. I'd been eating a donut. Let's just say the officer didn't appreciate being offered one. FML

#21223797
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39547) - you deserved it (13837)

On 07/29/2014 at 2:20pm - misc - by fatty magoo - United States (Washington)

Today, while out shopping, I could hear what sounded like two grown men talking about me, and they were being pretty gross. I turned around to scold them and it turned out being a dad and his 13-year-old son. He said he was, "teaching a son to be a man, and that my ass was grounds for discussion." FML

#21222536
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40243) - you deserved it (4489)

On 07/27/2014 at 10:54pm - misc - by tlm84 - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: