About Fortuitous : Be wary of defenestration.
This profile doesn't say much about me, so send me a message about anything. I always reply. My picture is a representation of my ideas about the world.
"Rise and rise again, until lambs become lions."
"Nothing is evil which is in accordance to nature."
"Even a stopped clock is right twice a day."
"Anybody can make history. Only a great man can write it."
"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."
To analyze a quote is to gain the wisdom it supplies. To use a quote is to truly understand its meaning.
Now, this is my interpretation of the FML caste system.
1. FML Gods: the radiance of this site (kind of like those dudes on Mount Olympus)
2. FML Demi-Gods: truly respected commenters that you can never, ever win an argument with
3. FML Geniuses: the hilarious Grammar Nazis that have display their prowess in beautifully destroying idiots
Then, everyone else.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I caught my husband modeling my cute floral panties. All he could manage to say was "I love you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21251) - you deserved it (3222)
On 10/01/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by canispankthat - United States (California)
Today, I failed my trigonometry exam because my scientific calculator was on the wrong setting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12881) - you deserved it (30120)
On 09/25/2010 at 4:57am - misc - by trigfail - New Zealand (Taranaki)
Today, at work I was bored so I started to doodle on MS paint. My boss walks by and asks me to join him in his office. When I do so, he fires me for drawing offensive material. I drew a rainbow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20701) - you deserved it (5098)
On 09/21/2010 at 9:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, whilst at my awards night, I got a boner, right as it was my turn to accept my award. To avoid a awkward situation, I flipped it up and under my belt. This failed to make the situation any less awkward, because the head of my penis poked out through my shirt, in plain view of the audience. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28513) - you deserved it (33927)
On 09/17/2010 at 2:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)
Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6538) - you deserved it (27830)
On 09/09/2010 at 4:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45370) - you deserved it (4597)
On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States
Today, I realized that not only am I still an unpublished author, but I can't even get an FML posted after submitting several in the last year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25937) - you deserved it (5131)
On 03/13/2010 at 8:43am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my looks alone made a girl cry. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22570) - you deserved it (3331)
On 03/07/2010 at 1:54pm - misc - by SadFace (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22620) - you deserved it (3232)
On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13801) - you deserved it (4338)
On 01/09/2010 at 8:25am - intimacy - by ohdeargodthatswrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, the doctor told me that I have Vasovagal Syncope: I pass out every time I get aroused. Bye bye sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30083) - you deserved it (1664)
On 01/07/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by Sanchez (man) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13999) - you deserved it (2267)
On 01/02/2010 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by xxxzzzooo (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend came in my room dressed as Harry Potter and declared that he was going to put his basilisk into my chamber of secrets. And yes, that was my first time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26827) - you deserved it (6523)
On 09/10/2009 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by ginny (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was with her. No, let me correct myself. Today, my girlfriend updated her Facebook status when I was in her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60721) - you deserved it (8174)
On 08/16/2009 at 2:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43882) - you deserved it (2115)
On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Friday 24 May 2013
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