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Fooberry's favorite FMLs
Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML
by Anonymous / 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by Anonymous / 09/28/2012 at 2:06pm / Netherlands (Gelderland) / Intimacy
by getajob / 09/28/2012 at 1:40pm / United States (Indiana) / Work
Today, I woke up feeling ecstatic, because last night, my crush had told my best friend he likes me a lot. I sent him a text message telling him the feeling is mutual. A little while after sending it, it hit me that his confession had only been part of a dream. FML
by hannah / 09/15/2012 at 6:16pm / New Zealand (Marlborough) / Love
Today, I was watching TV with my grandma. I said aloud, "Dang, that actor is hot." My grandma pointed out he was a spitting image of my cousin. I realized she was right, and that I may as well be attracted to my own cousin. FML
by Anonymous / 09/15/2012 at 12:11pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/15/2012 at 7:36am / United States (Delaware) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/08/2012 at 7:38am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 7:47pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I was playing some CoD online, when I realised I'd started humming an annoyingly catchy Bieber tune. Before I could come to my senses and pull out my mic, a bunch of my teammates started sarcastically singing along. FML
by bieberyoulittleSHIT / 08/31/2012 at 3:20pm / United Kingdom (York) / Geek
Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to try to serenade me by throwing rocks at my window and singing a song about how much he loves me. This would have been extremely sweet if he would have gotten my window instead of my dad's. FML
by Anonymous / 08/31/2012 at 6:16am / United States / Love
Today, I was working the cash register. While helping a customer with her groceries, my bra snapped. I then had to ask my male boss if I could staple it back together. Thirty minutes later it snapped again. I then had to explain to my boss that I was too broke to buy a new one. FML
by thatgirl17 / 08/31/2012 at 1:23am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I received a call from my future sister in-law, telling me that she and her future husband had decided to hold their wedding ceremony on my birthday. I was told not to celebrate my birthday, as it would "take away the attention to the true meaning of the day." FML
by SuzyTurquoiseBlu / 08/29/2012 at 1:32am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by Holly / 08/29/2012 at 12:59am / United States (Colorado) / Health
Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML
by Anonymous / 08/28/2012 at 7:08pm / United States (Indiana) / Love
- Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was… Today, I’m on a mission in Africa. My company driver is so old, deaf and half blind that I have to… Today, I took a restroom break in a Japanese train station. I couldn’t find the toilet flush, so I…