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Fmylifffeee

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Fmylifffeee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 23604
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Fmylifffeee : :D

Fmylifffeee's page activity

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Fmylifffeee's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52976) - you deserved it (26884)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52976) - you deserved it (26884)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52976) - you deserved it (26884)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, during the opening night performance of our schools musical, while I wasn't on stage I decided to use the restroom. I came out to find two of my fellow actresses putting their hands over my mouth. Apparently, I had left my microphone on and everyone heard me using the restroom. FML

Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML

#5522422
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66810) - you deserved it (9034)

On 09/28/2009 at 3:15am - misc - by ripfluffy (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I thought it would be fun to tease my dog by standing above her and hitting each of her paws repeatedly. My dog thought it would be fun to jump up and bite at my chest whilst I wasn't wearing a shirt. I just spent four hours in hospital getting my nipple sewn back on. FML

#5289656
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11465) - you deserved it (80307)

On 09/16/2009 at 9:24am - animals - by nipped (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I hired a private investigator to find out if my wife of 15 years is cheating on me with my brother. I don't know what's worse, that she is cheating on me, or that instead of cheating with my brother she's cheating with my brother's wife. FML

#5151842
220 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54606) - you deserved it (4972)

On 09/09/2009 at 5:20pm - love - by nick2.0 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was walking on a busy street. I saw this beautiful blonde walking across the street and a car was coming. I wanted to be like in the movies where the guy pushes the girl out of the way so she doesn't get hit. I accidentally pushed her the wrong way. Right into the car. FML

#5107087
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11867) - you deserved it (71082)

On 09/07/2009 at 3:21pm - misc - by ilovefootball (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML

#5050946
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14853) - you deserved it (44507)

On 09/04/2009 at 11:07pm - misc - by flexibleflatulance (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my friend and I were making sandwiches at his house. His family's dog wandered over just as I dropped a large chunk of cheddar on the floor. The dog snatched it up and ran away with it. I yelled after it, jokingly, that I hoped it would choke and die. It did. FML

#4932229
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26518) - you deserved it (49183)

On 08/30/2009 at 4:17pm - animals - by lily (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I decided to take a romantic trip to the beach. We got pulled over, and shortly thereafter he was arrested. Just so happens you can't miss child support payments for your twelve year old daughter without getting a warrant. He has a daughter? We've been married for 14 years. FML

#4845223
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62360) - you deserved it (3134)

On 08/26/2009 at 8:57pm - misc - by AreYouSerious (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML

#4639027
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14216) - you deserved it (64802)

On 08/18/2009 at 9:13pm - love - by litterbox_girl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was driving on the freeway and there was a dead animal (I think a cat) in the road. The car in front of me decided to merge over. It kicked up part of the dead animal and sent it flying through my open window. I think I got hit in the face with a piece of foot. FML

#4571897
102 comments

Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML

#4555175
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43824) - you deserved it (21017)

On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was very sick and kept throwing up. I took a shower after every time I threw up. While in the shower after I threw up, I had to throw up again, so I got out and ran to the toilet. I slipped on the tile, broke my nose on the floor, and then threw up. FML

#4543723
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51591) - you deserved it (9804)

On 08/15/2009 at 3:51am - health - by Ouch (man) - United States (Michigan)



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