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Florence_

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Florence_

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5897
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Florence_ : Come join me on dA and Tumblr!

dA: camillothemagician.deviantart.com

Tumblr: eldorado-to-the-moon.tumblr.com

Florence_'s page activity

Visits<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:22pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 6:29am<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:39pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 8:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:02am<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:26am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:52pm<b>isabelf</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 3:40am<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 8:39pm<b>RandomPrius</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 4:38pm<b>edsheeran2</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:24am<b>Konain</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:57am<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 11:08pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 02/22/2011 at 1:38am<b>fluffingclouds</b> - the 02/10/2011 at 7:16pm<b>chippa</b> - the 01/24/2011 at 6:57pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:23am

Fucked!<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 12:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 2:02pm

Florence_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Florence_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I called my mom for her birthday. She started talking about an infomercial she'd seen for a combo bidet-and-dryer, and how she would like to get one so she can feel "fresh down there" without worrying about getting bits of toilet paper on her nether regions. I can't un-hear this. FML

#13415843
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27358) - you deserved it (2923)

On 10/12/2010 at 1:46am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I learned that my boyfriend has narcolepsy when we were having sex and he passed out on top of me. FML

#13415492
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29793) - you deserved it (3930)

On 10/12/2010 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father if I could marry his daughter. He smiled, shook my hand, and said "No, now get out of my house." FML

#13353894
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43410) - you deserved it (4645)

On 10/07/2010 at 10:26am - love - by Vinny1017 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend found out I have OCD. When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other or I freak. After I brushed his face with the back of my hand he tackled me to the floor, held me down, and laughed at me while I panicked and tried to touch him with my other hand. FML

#13351667
424 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51013) - you deserved it (15837)

On 10/07/2010 at 2:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, after years of waiting, my mom and I finally received a check from Child Support Services. Excited, I opened it up to find a check from my dad, written out for 45 cents. Which pays for maybe half a loaf of bread. FML

#13350704
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32951) - you deserved it (3298)

On 10/07/2010 at 12:39am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love in the backseat. Being in the moment we didn't notice the car moving. We DID notice the pole that stopped us though. FML

#13346165
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9485) - you deserved it (35337)

On 10/06/2010 at 7:41pm - intimacy - by Remember the parking brake - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my friends took me to a strip club for my 25th birthday. I went onstage with 5 dollars in my mouth to tip the dancer. She then took off my belt and pants and spanked me 25 times with the buckle end of the belt. I paid a stripper 5 dollars to whoop my ass. FML

#13345855
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9834) - you deserved it (36768)

On 10/06/2010 at 7:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML

#13333152
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39283) - you deserved it (5453)

On 10/05/2010 at 7:36pm - work - by hospital - United States (New York)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

#13321339
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10989) - you deserved it (59137)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got hit by a Salami log thrown from a car; its metal wire cut my shoulder. I got scarred by a flying hunk of pig. FML

#13320249
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27435) - you deserved it (2649)

On 10/04/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by ifpigsflew (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my varsity swim team got second place in the State meet. My coach said I could bring the trophy home for the weekend. On the way home, I accidentally sat on it and broke it, cutting my butt. FML

#13319257
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10535) - you deserved it (34441)

On 10/04/2010 at 6:11pm - misc - by kat101 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, to spice things up a bit my wife and I were having sex in our kitchen. She was up on the counter and I moved her over to get in a better position. The stove was still hot from dinner so now my wife has a burn that looks like a double rainbow on her ass. FML

#13297808
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12221) - you deserved it (35255)

On 10/03/2010 at 12:27am - intimacy - by EffinAhole - Sent from mobile version

Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML

#13293107
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44466) - you deserved it (10032)

On 10/02/2010 at 7:08pm - kids - by blah blah daddy - United States (California)

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

#13285940
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68313) - you deserved it (6459)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:07am - love - by Pr unlucky - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while working at McDonald's, a woman asked me what came on a bacon, egg, and cheese biscuit. Trying not to laugh, I respond, "Bacon, egg, and cheese." She then realizes the stupidity of her question, and launches three dollars worth of quarters at my face and says, "Laugh at that, jerk." FML

#13212563
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35549) - you deserved it (6343)

On 09/26/2010 at 7:14pm - work - by lyssuhhhh (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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