Florence_

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Florence_

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6585
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Florence_ : Come join me on dA and Tumblr!

dA: camillothemagician.deviantart.com

Tumblr: eldorado-to-the-moon.tumblr.com

Florence_'s page activity

Visits<b>TheAspieDork</b> - the 09/04/2016 at 1:41pm<b>ztodaro</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 2:07am<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:22pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 6:29am<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:39pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 8:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:02am<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:26am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:52pm<b>isabelf</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 3:40am<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 8:39pm<b>RandomPrius</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 4:38pm<b>edsheeran2</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:24am<b>Konain</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:57am<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 11:08pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 02/22/2011 at 1:38am<b>chippa</b> - the 01/24/2011 at 6:57pm

Fucked!<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 12:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 2:02pm

Florence_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Florence_'s favorite FMLs

Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have received several voice mails from him accidentally dialed. They are from him riding the train, in a meeting, having lunch, and, most recently, him taking a monstrous dump. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2010 at 6:22pm / United States (Illinois) / Geek

Today, I received two cards in the mail for my late husband for his birthday. He has been dead for four years now, and the cards were from our two children, who live several states away. This is the fourth time it's happened, and neither of them answer my calls. Ever. FML

by widow / 10/19/2010 at 6:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I learned I was adopted and that my parents had died in a car accident when I was really young. My girlfriend was sitting next to me when I got the news, and several hours later broke up with me in a text stating, "I don't want to be with someone who doesn't have real parents." FML

by losingit / 10/19/2010 at 12:30am / United States (California) / Love

Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML

by S3R1AL K1LL3R X / 10/19/2010 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend because he's been working extra hard these last two months. I went to his house only to find him in bed with another girl. Standing there, with fifteen roses in my hands, all he could say was, "Thank you, can you put them in a vase?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2010 at 10:24am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Intimacy

Today, I found a surveillance camera in my room. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 8:27pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I came home from work. I was really tired and told my son that I would make him dinner later. He called the cops saying, "Mommy won't feed me." FML

by Lauren Smith / 10/17/2010 at 12:52pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, it was my dad's birthday. As a joke, I got him one of those big erasers that say, "FOR BIG MISTAKES." He opened it, tried to erase me with it, then said, "It doesn't work." and left. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 2:28am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 1:55am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

by married / 10/16/2010 at 8:31am / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I was on an airplane that was experiencing some turbulence. Feeling anxious, I reached over and grabbed my husband's hand for comfort. He then said, "Why are you scared of dying? You're not even pretty." FML

by Anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 2:44am / United States (California) / Love

Today, while working at the bakery, I slipped on a pen. I dropped the pie rack I was holding full of pies right on my face. I now have a burn mark on my cheek that looks like a swastika. FML

by hannahj88 / 10/16/2010 at 12:41am / Australia / Work

Today, I was told I look like Susan Boyle. FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML

by fungettingdressed / 10/12/2010 at 8:57am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was traveling by bus. There were no spare seats, so I stood next to a seated lady. When she got off at her stop, I was amused because her bum made the shape of a mushroom on the seat. I went to sit on it. So I'm sitting there when I realise the seat is really warm... and wet. FML

by babydoll / 10/12/2010 at 5:26am / United Kingdom (Fife) / Transportation