Florence_

Search for a member

Florence_

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6488
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Florence_ : Come join me on dA and Tumblr!

dA: camillothemagician.deviantart.com

Tumblr: eldorado-to-the-moon.tumblr.com

Florence_'s page activity

Visits<b>ztodaro</b> - the 08/06/2016 at 2:07am<b>yourmomshotfirst</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 3:22pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 6:29am<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 6:39pm<b>HarryHirsch</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 8:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 8:02am<b>Mynamewontfi</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 4:26am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 1:52pm<b>isabelf</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 3:40am<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 8:39pm<b>RandomPrius</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 4:38pm<b>edsheeran2</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 10:24am<b>Konain</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 10:57am<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 12/04/2013 at 11:08pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 02/22/2011 at 1:38am<b>chippa</b> - the 01/24/2011 at 6:57pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:23am

Fucked!<b>ARCHANGELGABRIEL</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 12:39am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 2:02pm

Florence_'s FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Florence_'s favorite FMLs

Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:03am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that the fish-shaped birth mark on the back of my leg, that I have had all my life, is not really shaped like a fish as I had originally thought. It looks just like a penis. FML

by BYUwildchild / 12/17/2010 at 11:23am / United States / Health

Today, not only did I miss my bus by seconds, I also saw the bus driver smirking as he drove past me in the middle of the Canadian winter. FML

by peanutface / 12/17/2010 at 8:20am / Canada / Transportation

Today, I was helping a customer when she asked if we were open on Christmas eve. I wasn't sure, so I asked my manager. My manager looked me over and said, "Yes, we will be open. Thank you for volunteering to come in." FML

by adjk90 / 12/16/2010 at 12:06pm / United States / Work

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

by nukebroadcast / 12/16/2010 at 1:32am / United States (Nevada) / Health

Today, I reactivated my Facebook account, having not used it for three months. My "friends" didn't realize this. According to their recent status updates, I'm disgustingly fat, have a hook nose, and I'm secretly hated. FML

by unlovedfatty / 12/15/2010 at 8:01pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my toddler stood up in a shopping cart and fell, giving himself a black eye. Later, while at a restaurant, he tried to stand up in his high-chair. I quickly blurted out, "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. The waiter wouldn’t stop glaring at me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2010 at 12:42am / United States (Nevada) / Kids

Today, a man dressed as Santa Claus walked by me, grabbing my butt. He smelled of pipe tobacco and pee. He pulled me close to him and whispered, "I bet you're naughty but you feel so nice." I looked dumbfounded at him as he winked and yelled, "You're on my list." FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2010 at 12:09am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy

Today, whilst pleasuring myself in my bedroom, I began absent-mindedly staring at a spider on the ceiling. It wasn't until the point of climax that I realised that I was, in effect, masturbating over a spider. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2010 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Intimacy

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

by uglywoman / 12/14/2010 at 3:21am / Australia (Queensland) / Kids

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

by Christopher / 12/13/2010 at 4:16am / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML

by bribreeeeeezyfreshhh / 12/06/2010 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I got married. When my father gave me away, in front of hundreds of people, to my groom, he said, "She's your problem now." FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2010 at 1:25am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I woke up after a dream where I got it good from none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The problem? I'm a guy, and straight. Apparently my subconscious has a fetish for old Austrian bodybuilders. FML

by Anonymous / 12/04/2010 at 6:23am / Sweden (Skane Lan) / Intimacy