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Firegirl741

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Firegirl741

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 14 March 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2015
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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Visits<b>xxButtersxx</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:57pm

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Firegirl741's favorite FMLs

Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML

#21281374
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18099) - you deserved it (1668)

On 10/19/2014 at 10:20pm - kids - by team hit bella with a car (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up to my daughter crying, and my son running through the living room completely naked with her bottle, laughing his head off. FML

#21279992
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25316) - you deserved it (2774)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:30pm - kids - by KayyElOh94 - United States

Today, while out for dinner with my parents, a woman, approximately the same age as my mother, repeatedly propositioned me for sex during the course of my meal. After declining firmly several times, she only stopped after my mother convinced her I was gay. FML

#21279658
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31533) - you deserved it (2762)

On 10/17/2014 at 6:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32810) - you deserved it (3550)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

#21278356
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24147) - you deserved it (48199)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I woke up to my roommate trying to put a burrito and a pack of mild sauce in between my boobs. He's only lived here for two weeks, and this is the second time I've woken up to him doing something like this. FML

#21278162
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37015) - you deserved it (4426)

On 10/15/2014 at 2:27am - misc - by burritobreasts -

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30991) - you deserved it (4377)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, I got back from a weekend at my best friend's house. Apparently, he and his friend invented a new game. It involves sticking duct tape to their pubic hairs, ripping them out, and sticking as many as possible on my face and body before I wake up. FML

#21276742
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30079) - you deserved it (3123)

On 10/13/2014 at 4:17am - misc - by wtfguys - United States

Today, I received an email from an angry parent, demanding that I give his daughter an A on a project which I had given her a 0 on. The project was to pick an article related to science and to write an essay on it. Hers was a hoax article relating to Ebola patients rising from the dead. FML

#21276337
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33209) - you deserved it (4867)

On 10/12/2014 at 4:46pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I stood up too quickly and got dizzy, so I sat on the edge of the bed to regain my balance. I started dozing off to sleep again, got confused, and peed down the side of my bed thinking I was on the toilet. FML

#21272641
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34235) - you deserved it (9143)

On 10/07/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Waterfalls (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I finally got around to cleaning out my mother's things after her passing. In the process I found a fancy box. What did it contain? A collection of crack pipes. FML

#21270609
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35622) - you deserved it (2567)

On 10/04/2014 at 10:58am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized how weak I truly am when I tore a muscle in my hand trying to discreetly fix a wedgie. FML

#21266558
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30295) - you deserved it (5549)

On 09/27/2014 at 7:55pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to use the porta potty at the construction site I work at and found two homeless people having sex in it. I almost got fired, because my advisor blamed me. FML

#21264426
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (226) - you deserved it (2667)

On 09/24/2014 at 9:58am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I caught my little sister taking a selfie in the mirror with a fake nose piercing, peace sign, and a duck face. She's 12. FML

#21251377
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38006) - you deserved it (3355)

On 09/03/2014 at 7:35pm - kids - by MusicLover18 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my sister introduced me to her new, deaf boyfriend. She proudly proclaimed that she was trying to learn sign language for his sake, so he wouldn't have to read her lips. I'm also deaf and have been trying to get her to do the same for me for 20 goddamn years. FML

#21250726
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50452) - you deserved it (2474)

On 09/02/2014 at 7:38pm - misc - by SadAndDeaf -



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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FML's blog

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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