Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FinJage

Offline (21 hours ago) | Search for a member

FinJage

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4905
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About FinJage : | Say goodnight to the Voices in your head |
| You never heard them anyway |
| You just might be insane |

FinJage's page activity

Visits<b>wolfgold2</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 10:03pm<b>petrolhead</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 9:56am<b>kelsorg</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 11:31am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 12:58pm<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 3:52pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 7:59pm<b>axeno</b> - the 04/24/2014 at 2:37am<b>ArielTheMermaid</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 1:02pm<b>auzieforever705</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 6:52pm<b>TallyFtw69</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 3:26am<b>Nordrag</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 11:02pm<b>October3461</b> - the 12/25/2013 at 4:19am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 8:54pm<b>JessicaRenee95</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 10:27pm<b>Red__Forman</b> - the 11/08/2013 at 1:36am<b>kashea</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 11:45pm<b>Jannis</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 12:30pm<b>pil_84</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 7:53am

FinJage's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of FinJage's badges

FinJage's favorite FMLs

Today, I had just sat down in the lobby of my doctor's office when my phone alerted me that I had a friend request. I checked; it was from some girl from high school. I muttered to myself, "I don't want to be your friend." I then heard a gasp. She was sitting across from me. FML

Today, I went on a blind date at a restaurant. My date took one look at me and said pityingly, "Stuffed your bra, didn't ya? Seriously, why even bother?" The douche then started trying to lecture me on "false advertising". FML

#21124319
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42404) - you deserved it (7316)

On 04/27/2014 at 1:05pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my teenage daughter tried to convince me that the UK is a part of Canada. After I pulled out a map to prove her wrong, she got all angry and defensive, and said that nobody's perfect at "geometry". My daughter is an idiot. FML

#21122867
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49748) - you deserved it (9950)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42506) - you deserved it (3540)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

#21102946
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47896) - you deserved it (5921)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm - kids - by I Have Failed (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, my students all handed in their 1,000 word papers. The assignment was for them to write about a strong, benevolent leader who influenced the world. Around half of the papers were about Hitler. FML

#21102694
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40197) - you deserved it (9483)

On 04/02/2014 at 7:30am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to a coffee shop. As I headed over to stand in line, I tripped over my own feet. I got back up, then tripped up yet again. Everyone was staring, and I was so mortified that I went to leave. I then struggled with the door under their glares before realising it opened the other way. FML

#21094549
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40519) - you deserved it (6097)

On 03/23/2014 at 7:02pm - misc - by butterbody - United Kingdom

Today, I was treating a patient at the hospital where I'm a dentist. This particular gentleman was old and slightly deaf. After completing the procedure I gestured to the spitoon and asked him to spit. He got up, steadied himself, and spat straight in my face. FML

#21093322
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37035) - you deserved it (3419)

On 03/22/2014 at 7:56am - work - by Dr.Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I was shopping, when a man pointed at me and said to his friend, "Her. She's the one." He replied, "Yes, she'll do fine." I'm scared. FML

Today, at my therapy appointment, I was spilling my guts to my therapist. When I'd finished, to get rid of the awkward silence, I asked, "I'm not crazy, right?" His response was, "That's bit of a loaded question." FML

#21066990
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34422) - you deserved it (5269)

On 02/20/2014 at 9:46pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was waiting in line at a clothes store when someone cut in in front of me, and the gentlemen in front of me. I shouted, "Hey! Queue starts back here!". He responded by pointing out the "gentlemen" in front was actually a very realistic mannequin. FML

#21056589
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34380) - you deserved it (15353)

On 02/10/2014 at 7:45pm - misc - by QueueJumper (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, whilst getting out of the shower, I tripped on the lip of the siding, bruising my middle toe. I fell, and in doing so, squished my cat. She won't even make eye contact and keeps wheezing. I have a feeling she is plotting my death. FML

Today, a robin flew into my window and died. My mom, being a biology teacher, thought it would be a great experience for my brother and me to dissect it on the kitchen table. She threatened to ground us if we didn't do it. FML

#21054692
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42836) - you deserved it (3858)

On 02/08/2014 at 6:24pm - animals - by sciencesadness (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, wanting to break up with my boyfriend, I invited him to dinner with my parents. I was sure they'd hate him, which would give me the excuse I needed. They ended up loving him, and now they won't stop mentioning marriage. FML

#21053604
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22041) - you deserved it (47294)

On 02/07/2014 at 6:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

#21050725
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35897) - you deserved it (40362)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:48pm - health - by anonymous - United States



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: