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FilleNoir

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FilleNoir

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 30 March 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2689
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About FilleNoir : I just love to read peoples funny life moments! Well... They're funny to me at least.

FilleNoir's page activity

Visits<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 4:46am<b>wooooooowreally</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:11pm<b>mychallm92</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 10:58pm<b>RoamingHobo</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 4:24am<b>creeperwindow</b> - the 02/05/2014 at 10:19pm<b>sammyjo06</b> - the 02/04/2014 at 9:09pm

FilleNoir's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of FilleNoir's badges

FilleNoir's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

#21025933
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31722) - you deserved it (39332)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I learned that my new parakeet hates her reflection, and will screech loudly day and night unless I take the mirror out. My other parakeet loves the mirror and constantly cries out when I remove it. I can't win. FML

#21021435
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42626) - you deserved it (5567)

On 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm - animals - by bird - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46703) - you deserved it (12648)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML

#21010622
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46885) - you deserved it (4750)

On 12/30/2013 at 4:38pm - love - by smokecloud_ (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I have to take time off from work to take part in an intervention because my sister's obsession with the guy from Harry Potter has crossed over into illegality. FML

#21009908
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38426) - you deserved it (3043)

On 12/29/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by LeaveHimAlone (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45842) - you deserved it (3627)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40266) - you deserved it (9585)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

#21007435
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44574) - you deserved it (4084)

On 12/27/2013 at 4:49pm - love - by -__- (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 19-year-old brother subjected me to yet another rant about how the writers of My Little Pony aren't writing the show for people like him any more, the "true fans", otherwise known as pimply-faced adults who don't use deodorant and only shower once a week. FML

#21007374
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35436) - you deserved it (4004)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML

#21007355
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44991) - you deserved it (5114)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)

Today, my roommate, who happens to be a writer, got so pissed off at his editor that he got drunk, wrapped his arms around my waist, and only stopped when I agreed to spoon him. This is not the first time this has happened either. FML

#20989886
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37704) - you deserved it (5204)

On 12/12/2013 at 3:51am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

#20985190
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46564) - you deserved it (5127)

On 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me but wanted to make sure that we were still friends, so he could still use my Netflix. FML

#20963690
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43754) - you deserved it (3421)

On 11/19/2013 at 7:19pm - love - by unwantedforlife (woman) - United States

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML

Today, my husband got mad at me for not helping take out the groceries from the car. He yelled that I'm lazy, and that he regrets our marriage. I guess he forgot that the door handle on that side is broken and he had to let me out of the car. FML

#20953907
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45687) - you deserved it (4148)

On 11/11/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by LetMeOut - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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