Ferretface

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Ferretface

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9139
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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Ferretface's page activity

Visits<b>haris1299</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 3:02am<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 3:11am<b>UnidentifiedFun</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 1:03pm<b>missinthebestie</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 9:18pm<b>Tasniax3</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:32pm<b>PlushhLove</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 8:33pm<b>azhaela</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 7:00pm<b>g9m9brown</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 2:26am<b>cwells0430</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 11:33pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 12:15pm<b>onion00</b> - the 03/27/2013 at 12:15am<b>JessicaNovelli</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 1:22am<b>StaceeeP</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 12:56am<b>ICastillo</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 12:35am<b>Catkam623</b> - the 01/09/2013 at 2:15pm<b>ChingChongLing</b> - the 11/25/2011 at 4:40pm<b>Gigglebear</b> - the 07/28/2011 at 7:19pm<b>killakiwi</b> - the 06/29/2011 at 12:01pm

Fucked!<b>haris1299</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:02am

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Ferretface's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on Facebook chat with my boss, talking about holiday hours. I had to go to my doctor's appointment, so I said, "G2G, love you" accidentally. Not only did he say it back, but he also requested a relationship with me on Facebook. FML

by ohshat / 12/22/2009 at 1:05pm / United States (Nebraska) / Work

Today, I slipped as I was about to take a shower, knocking myself out cold. I woke up to someone banging on my door. It was a cop checking to see if I was okay. When I asked how he knew to come, he said he was notified by "a male neighbor who called anonymously." I guess I have a peeping Tom. FML

by ThatAintLogical / 12/18/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Louisiana) / Health

Today, my little brother punched me in the stomach. When I didn't flinch and he asked me why, I decided to be funny and tell him I was Iron Man and nothing could hurt me. Two seconds later he took a step back and kicked me in the nuts as hard as he could. FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2009 at 6:46pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandson asked how old I am and whether I'd seen Mammoths "for real" when I was a kid. FML

by Granmacathy / 11/29/2009 at 2:13am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I had to put my 17 year old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML

by petlover / 11/22/2009 at 11:30pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I got the flu. Feeling really sick and depressed, I called my boyfriend to get some comfort. When he didn't answer his cell, I called his house, only to hear his mother telling me "he was so sad that we broke up." I didn't know. FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2009 at 6:47am / Denmark (Nordjylland) / Love

Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML

by Anonymous / 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, at 2 in the morning, a noisy work crew started up in the parking lot next to my apartment. What were they doing at that ungodly hour? Installing a light that now shines right into my window. FML

by theropod / 11/15/2009 at 2:45pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML

by TheMichaelNixon / 11/14/2009 at 4:37pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I asked a girl I like out. She ended up having an asthma attack because she was laughing so hard. I guess that's a no. FML

by asthma_attacker / 11/14/2009 at 1:38pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I went to see the cast list for the new musical I'm in. I didn't get the part I wanted, and instead I got the part of one of the suitors. Interestingly, they made me the suitor to my ex. And the guy she leaves me for at the end of the musical is the guy she left me for in real life. FML

by Indoraptor / 11/14/2009 at 7:59am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I auditioned for a part and made it because the director thought I would be "perfect" for the part and I was "just like the character in every way." The part is for a schizophrenic drug addict who everyone hates and is stabbed to death in the second scene. FML

by Falafax / 11/12/2009 at 4:37pm / United States / Work

Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML

by Teaching / 11/12/2009 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML

by FML / 11/12/2009 at 2:14am / United States (Utah) / Work

Today, I finished up my physics project. I had to make some thing out of toothpicks and glue that will keep an egg from breaking when dropped 20 feet. It took me 10 hours to make it, but only took my dad 10 seconds to step on it and break it. It's due tomorrow. FML

by Physics fail. / 11/11/2009 at 2:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous