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Ferretface

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Ferretface

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 4642
  • Number of comments : 100
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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Ferretface's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

#9040804
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25841) - you deserved it (8838)

On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Havering)

Today, my new anti-social cat started rubbing on my leg. I thought she must be warming up to me. Then, I looked at my leg and saw she smeared poo all over my work pants. FML

#9037311
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22573) - you deserved it (2814)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:18am - animals - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my iPod came back from repair and still had a distorted sound. I've been through calls, meetings, and repairs with Apple since Christmas, and it still sounds like the half speaker in my old car. Then I found out the new Nano requires you to push the headphones plug in harder. FML

#9037233
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4852) - you deserved it (35936)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:16am - misc - by EwokLover17 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment, when I came across a lacy black thong in the laundry. When confronted, he swore it was his. I don't know what's worse, the possibility that another woman left it there, or the idea that my boyfriend owns and wears women's lingerie. FML

#9037172
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25825) - you deserved it (2644)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:14am - love - by botharebad (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to wear my Ugg boots to work. I forgot that my office is carpeted and that the fur in my boots makes me shock every metal thing I touch. I work with computers all day. FML

#9021346
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6609) - you deserved it (30595)

On 03/12/2010 at 11:39am - work - by jewel87 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up crying in the middle of a nightmare in which my boyfriend of 8 months shot me through the heart whilst laughing as I screamed 'I Love You'. After I told him about this, he took me into his arms as I cried, stroked my back and said, 'What kind of gun was it?' FML

#9019177
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28793) - you deserved it (6502)

On 03/12/2010 at 8:17am - love - by justlittleoldme (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I thought I lost my wallet. Canceled my bank cards. Bought a new wallet. Got a $141 parking fine at the motor registry while getting my replacement license which also cost me $22. Went to go to the gym and when I went to put my bike jacket on, felt something inside the sleeve. My wallet. FML

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. When I told the man that I wanted Tinkerbell on my lower back area. He snorted and told me that I was way too old to have Tinkerbell on me, and that Disney characters are only cute on people 35 and younger. I'm 23. FML

#9011499
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23482) - you deserved it (11534)

On 03/11/2010 at 10:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I met my boyfriend's extended family. His grandpa was apparently senile, as he kept calling me "Tilly" and asking me to dance. His relatives thought this hilarious and busted out the video camera. Later, I learned his grandpa is not senile at all - the family was playing a joke on me. FML

#8968601
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25178) - you deserved it (3651)

On 03/10/2010 at 9:54am - love - by NotTilly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my parents took my laptop, cut the Internet, took my car keys and TV, and removed my bedroom door. Why? Because they thought the plant I was growing for my science project was a marijuana plant. Oh yeah, they took that too. My presentation is tomorrow. FML

#8965755
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32134) - you deserved it (2345)

On 03/10/2010 at 3:39am - misc - by Kevin - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I discovered that my mother uses my eyebrow tweezers to pull ticks off the dog. She also hasn't figured out that just dipping the tweezers in alcohol doesn't automatically sterilize them. Especially if there is icky dog hair still stuck on. FML

#8958709
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19275) - you deserved it (2681)

On 03/09/2010 at 10:12pm - health - by whoanoa (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I learned not to jump off a stage if nobody is going to catch you. FML

#8941097
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6303) - you deserved it (32748)

On 03/09/2010 at 6:14am - health - by oww - United States (Virginia)

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He says "yeah well you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

#8938160
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29251) - you deserved it (3554)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:04am - love - by fu2then (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I learned that you don't put your diamond earrings on over your bathroom sink. FML

#8915747
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9094) - you deserved it (38435)

On 03/08/2010 at 8:19am - misc - by what434 - United States

Today, my friend and I went to the park. I bet my friend I could fit into the swing that was sized for toddlers. I managed to fit in, but I couldn't get out. My friend had to call 911 to get me out. When they finally did, the fireman told me that fat ladies shouldn't try stuff like that. FML

#8883543
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7985) - you deserved it (33335)

On 03/07/2010 at 12:41am - health - by fatlady - United States (Pennsylvania)



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