About Fence : I'm a kid from Maryland who's really quite boring. I draw stupid comics and play music in an indie-ternative-ska-rap-hardcore-emo-metal band that's going nowhere, and getting there noisily. And..... that's all, really. Yeah.
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Fence's favorite FMLs
by bluntedone / 02/02/2009 at 11:42pm / United States (Arizona) / Money
Today, I was in one of those lucid half sleeps with my boyfriend. Not fully awake to control myself, I ripped ass. I had no idea what to do. I pretended to still be sleeping. I'm pretty sure he noticed because he patted me on the back in a congratulatory sort of way. FML
by amg85904 / 01/29/2009 at 7:13pm / United States (Ohio) / Love
by kiddo / 01/28/2009 at 10:42am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
by crazyvulva9216 / 01/26/2009 at 8:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Nik / 01/23/2009 at 10:41am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Noname / 01/19/2009 at 5:26am / Canada (Alberta) / Money
Today, a drunk girl asked me for directions to her hotel. I had just bought an empanada and was feeling good, so I agree to look up the address on my phone. Two minutes and a text charge later, I got the address. Out of inebriated glee, she hugged me and knocked the tasty empanada out of my hand. FML
by Hungry / 01/14/2009 at 10:01am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I organized a party, invited a girl I've been secretly in love with for years, as well as a friend of mine who brought along an unknown mate of his. The party was fine, although the unknown mate threw up all over the floor. Now, the girl is dating that unknown mate and is in love with him. FML
by bbns / 01/14/2009 at 6:57am / Germany (Hessen) / Love
Today, we were out smoking a bit of spliff just walking around. We saw a place to sit down in this little car park we were walking past. The cops came over and busted us. Turns out we were in the main car park for the cop shop. FML
by karl / 01/10/2009 at 1:50am / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went into a shop, not really completely awake. To get to the upper floor, I took the escalator... in the wrong direction. After about 30 seconds (which seemed like hours) trying to climb up the wrong way, my brain started working and by that time I already had a few amused spectators watching me. FML
by maaaryy / 01/07/2009 at 12:53am / Miscellaneous
Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML
Today, I needed to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone had left work, I decided that, since I AM a Jedi, my penis ought to be my lightsaber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: "At least someone is having fun!" It was my boss. FML
- Today, my boyfriend of 7 months broke up with me, and then asked if I'd give him head one last time… Today, my friend set up a profile for me on an adult dating site as a surprise. It was a surprise… Today, I was sitting on the couch, computer next to me, lotion on the floor, and my dick in my hand…