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Today, I was peppered with questions about my swollen eye and if I'd gotten into a fight. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I'd been brutally beaten into submission by a doorknob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11567) - you deserved it (2749)
On 03/24/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Stephen (man) - Sweden
Today, while hiking and wearing sandals, I stubbed my toe. This wouldn't have been so bad had it not been into a cactus with 3 inch thorns. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7371) - you deserved it (17946)
On 03/23/2012 at 10:42pm - health - by Anon - United States
Today, I was walking back to my hotel from the town square, and got lost. I turned back and walked around town for an hour, freaking out and panicking. When I finally found the hotel, I realized it was practically a stone's throw from where I was when I turned around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11531) - you deserved it (5328)
On 03/20/2012 at 12:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Orebro Lan)
Today, I went to see a dinosaur exhibition with my mum. We walked around and saw a huge dinosaur, made of plastic and rubber. She was very disappointed, saying that she thought there would be real live dinosaurs for us to see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20033) - you deserved it (1566)
On 03/19/2012 at 7:43pm - animals - by bibi (woman) - Slovenia (Bohinj)
Today, I had just finished up at work. I was standing on a street corner, waiting to cross to get to my car on the other side. I had three people pull up beside me and ask me how much I charged. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18287) - you deserved it (6789)
On 03/15/2012 at 4:44pm - love - by W45T3D_Y0UTH (woman) - Canada
Today, I was watching a kid at school walk like a gangster. My teacher was standing there, so I stood behind the kid and walked like him, laughing to myself, at which point my teacher took me to one side and told me the kid was handicapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6899) - you deserved it (38200)
On 03/14/2012 at 4:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I was working retail when a group of older gentlemen came in looking for a good sound system. I showed them a top-range system and gushed about it in detail, trying to close the sale. One of them snorted and said, "See Dave, girls like her are the reason ball gags were invented." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17742) - you deserved it (2502)
On 03/12/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by sandi519 (woman) - United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32955) - you deserved it (19748)
On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
I agree, your life sucks (32955) - you deserved it (19748)
On 03/04/2012 at 12:02am - love - by Autocorrected (man) - Philippines (Bulacan)
Today, I've had chairs thrown at me, kicks have hit me in the nuts and I've heard "I'm gonna fucking kill you, bitch" several times. I work at a kindergarten. And this is a good day compared to what I'm used to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32003) - you deserved it (2490)
Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14036) - you deserved it (44575)
On 12/25/2011 at 6:39am - animals - by Anonymoose (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, my landlord came to my apartment because of complaints from my neighbors, saying that animals are not allowed inside. Turns out my roommate makes cat-noises when she's bored. My landlord still doesn't believe me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20408) - you deserved it (1419)
On 12/13/2011 at 8:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)
Today, I was lying on the floor playing with my cat. I was holding her in the air, when my sister tripped over the TV cord and unplugged the cable. The TV made a loud fuzzy sound, I got scared and threw my cat in the air. I got scratched in the face by a falling cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11871) - you deserved it (15829)
On 11/29/2011 at 11:15am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend peeing in the cat's litter box. I'm the one who has to clean it out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20648) - you deserved it (2969)
On 11/26/2011 at 10:38am - misc - by meeeeeee - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25557) - you deserved it (2390)
On 11/24/2011 at 12:07pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Monday 20 May 2013
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