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You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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Fausty29's favorite FMLs
by fartypants / 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm / United States (Florida) / Work
Today, I asked my boyfriend to come hang out with me. He said he was busy and had to do homework. Since he never studies, I got suspicious and went to check up on him. I found him playing dress-up with his cat. He's 17. FML
by iamfab / 06/06/2015 at 1:52am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
by Anonymous / 06/05/2015 at 8:21am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/27/2015 at 9:39am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Health
Today, I found out the fund-raiser my uncle ran to raise money for his cancer treatment was all a sham, that he doesn't even have cancer, and that the money was to fund a coke habit nobody knew he even had. FML
by Anonymous / 03/29/2015 at 9:33am / Philippines (Benguet) / Money
by Pukey / 03/28/2015 at 5:30pm / United States / Kids
by RadioactiveKush / 03/01/2015 at 2:07am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by OzzyWannabee / 02/20/2015 at 3:12am / Miscellaneous
by heymacie / 02/19/2015 at 12:45am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I responded to an emergency call for an intoxicated 83-year-old man with chest pains. As I leaned forward to check his lung sounds, he groped my chest and said, "Nice rack". I just wanted to see if he had difficulty breathing. I don't even get paid for this, I'm a volunteer for the town. FML
by EMTGirl'sLife / 02/09/2015 at 10:15pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work
by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, my fiancée and I were making plans for our wedding when my soon-to-be mother-in-law chimed in with, "You know, she can still get out of this. I got the dress for her but we can save it for the next guy." I'm not sure if she's joking or not. FML
by bingalingading / 01/02/2015 at 8:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Love
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
by Anonymous / 01/02/2015 at 5:14pm / United States (Maryland) / Love
by Anonymous / 01/02/2015 at 11:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML
by anyoldnamewilldo / 12/11/2014 at 11:10am / United States (Ohio) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 3Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his…