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Fausty29

Offline (the 01/27/2015 at 10:00pm) | Search for a member

Fausty29

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  • Number of visits : 369
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Fausty29's page activity

Visits<b>Gian__o</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 10:00am

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Fausty29's favorite FMLs

Today, my fiancée and I were making plans for our wedding when my soon-to-be mother-in-law chimed in with, "You know, she can still get out of this. I got the dress for her but we can save it for the next guy." I'm not sure if she's joking or not. FML

#21329587
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27344) - you deserved it (1981)

On 01/02/2015 at 8:46pm - love - by bingalingading (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML

#21329473
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29077) - you deserved it (8587)

On 01/02/2015 at 5:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

#21329304
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30089) - you deserved it (2167)

On 01/02/2015 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I wore what I thought was a hideous sweater from the thrift store for an ugly sweater contest. I've gotten more compliments on it than anything else I've ever worn. I can't even succeed at failure. FML

#21315542
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28443) - you deserved it (3228)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:10am - work - by anyoldnamewilldo (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I thought it'd be fun to kick open one of those unisex bathrooms in my workplace. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me or my boss who was in there taking a dump. FML

#21315499
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13947) - you deserved it (34950)

On 12/11/2014 at 8:26am - work - by unlucky (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I asked my dad why we didn't have any baby pictures. His response was, "They got lost in the flood of '93." I was born in '95. FML

#21314190
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30341) - you deserved it (2205)

On 12/09/2014 at 12:45am - misc - by mn167109 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML

#21290313
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35489) - you deserved it (3143)

On 11/02/2014 at 6:28am - health - by smellyhair - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was giving me a back massage while I was laying on my stomach. A few minutes into it, he stopped. I turned around to see why; he was taking a picture of my butt. FML

#21290182
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29351) - you deserved it (6457)

On 11/02/2014 at 12:51am - love - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

#21289293
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29234) - you deserved it (3316)

On 10/31/2014 at 8:39pm - love - by grossedout -

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

#21288917
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31308) - you deserved it (2616)

On 10/31/2014 at 6:55am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Rhondda Cynon Taff)

Today, I got sick at school. When someone called my mom for permission for me to leave, she told them she doesn't have a daughter and to never call that number again. FML

Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML

#21258420
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35281) - you deserved it (2782)

On 09/14/2014 at 11:07pm - work - by nocat6 (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I ran one of the hardest cross-country courses in the country. I'm a pretty good runner, and I was feeling confident for the first mile. Then the chipotle from last night's dinner hit, and my legs weren't the only thing running. FML

#21257129
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36289) - you deserved it (8476)

On 09/12/2014 at 8:19pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35354) - you deserved it (2932)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching "My Strange Addiction". The woman featured ate rocks. While judging her weird habit, I realised I was chewing on a coat-hanger the whole time. FML

#21256247
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32764) - you deserved it (12551)

On 09/11/2014 at 10:57am - misc - by ayeayeboy19 - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)



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