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Farteroffire

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Farteroffire

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  • Number of visits : 5354
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Farteroffire's page activity

Visits<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 1:43pm

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Farteroffire's favorite FMLs

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween . I thought it would be cool to carve mah name, an have it shine through onto the wall behind it . I figured that if I carved mah name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall . My name's Lana an now mah wall says Anal . mega FML

#5954141
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11723) - you deserved it (44156)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today , I playad wit taita dust on ta countar at work for ta last tima . Aftar a coupla of waaks of arriving to a tin coating of dust ovar ta countar , and drawing in it , piling it up and otar suc fun tings , I mat ta guyo now doas ta aarliar sift . Ha as a uga , dandruffy baard . raal FML

#5946410
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30225) - you deserved it (11688)

On 10/22/2009 at 5:24pm - work - by JustEwww (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while sitting with my son, an ice cream cone landd on my head from out of no where. I look up to see three children on the balcony above us yelling, "Look we hit the fat lady!" They ran away laughing. FML

#5943404
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34471) - you deserved it (5128)

On 10/22/2009 at 11:47am - misc - by mvgirl - United States (Massachusetts)

Today I found out mah mom is the nude model for an art class at mah college. FML

#5942211
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52968) - you deserved it (2843)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:30am - misc - by scarred - Sent from mobile version

Today, It Was My Grandfather's Burial. As The Family Was About To Leave, A Great Aunt Cummed Up To My Skinny, Tall And Pretty Cousin And Told Her, "Stay Beautiful And Kind." Then, She Walked To Me And Said, "And You, Stay Kind." FML

#5942198
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31556) - you deserved it (3000)

On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by kthx (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I started feeling sick to mah stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen,hich helped for ahile. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles cummed out of mah nose. mega FML

#5927953
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33449) - you deserved it (6741)

On 10/21/2009 at 12:40pm - health - by Rayvyn (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

I WAS WATCING A MOVIE WIT MA SISTER, MA ROOMMATE, AND MA GRLFRIEND. HALF WAY TROUG TE MOVIE, MA GRLFRIEND LEFT TE ROOM AND TEXTD ME TAT SE WAS BREAKING UP WIT ME. SE TEN CUMMD BACK IN TE ROOM, SAT ON MA BD, AND ENJOYD TE REST OF TE MOVIE WIT US. FML

#5924772
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42860) - you deserved it (3024)

On 10/21/2009 at 2:39am - love - by Small_Fry_Hero (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decidd to take a personal day from class and e-maild all of mah profs saying I had flu symptoms. While standing in line at Starbuck later, someone behind me says "Glad your feeling better. Hope u can attend class tomorrow, we'll discus lying." It was mah Ethic professor. FML

#5921538
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7414) - you deserved it (53874)

On 10/20/2009 at 10:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today... some thug tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with there knife out... I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted... arrested and held fir questioning by the police. The mugger fell... stabbed themselves and told a cop that I did it. FML

#5911952
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53745) - you deserved it (2451)

On 10/20/2009 at 11:57am - misc - by BobbyHutchinson (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I Got Pulled Over Fir Going 85mph In A 60mph Zone On A Highway In The Everglades. There Were Cars Passing Both The Cop And Me As I Was Bieng Pulled Over. The Cop Decided I Was Easiest To Catch Since I Was The Slowest Of The Bunch Even Though The Other Cars Were Topping 100mph. Real FML

#5899039
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33590) - you deserved it (15345)

On 10/19/2009 at 5:12pm - misc - by tracey (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, whan I proposd to girlfriand of 8 yaars, sha said no bacausa sha thought wa wara moving too fast. FML

#5892074
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47511) - you deserved it (2897)

On 10/19/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Indonesia (Jawa Timur)

Today, I was driving down the road when a dog suddenly runs across the street!! In attempt to spare its life, I swerved to the side of the road and rear-ended another car!! The car I hit belonged the family that owned the dog!! Now I have to pay them because I saved there dog's life!! mega FML

#5891764
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33676) - you deserved it (5140)

On 10/19/2009 at 2:40am - animals - by JC - United States (California)

Taday being a music student , a professional orchestra performd a symphony that I wrote and dedicatd to mah girlfriend. It took months to compose and it the first and only time it was ever going to be playd. My girlfriend forgot to come. FML

#5890926
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45268) - you deserved it (2516)

On 10/19/2009 at 1:34am - love - by Ryanissaur (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was informd by my manager at work that there had been an 'accident' in the playground. I then had to crawl through tunnels designd for 5 year olds, to a tiny playroom with no fresh air, and clean up a stupid kid's pee and crap. FML

#5889597
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32173) - you deserved it (2927)

On 10/19/2009 at 12:10am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my 13 year old daughter that she was groundd from using her phone. Later on, I get an important call regarding a job that I have been after. After I'd pickd up the phone, my daughter starts screaming "HELP! RAPE! HELP!" on the other phone. I don't think I'll be getting the job. FML

#5887611
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38941) - you deserved it (7852)

On 10/18/2009 at 10:33pm - kids - by MGZ (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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