Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

False_Stupidity

Online | Search for a member

False_Stupidity

5Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 September 1975 (39 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4620
  • Number of comments : 2072
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About False_Stupidity : Nothing to see here... Move along












... See!
I told you there was nothing here, but you just had to look!

False_Stupidity's page activity

Visits<b>hurricanemonster</b> - 12 hours ago<b>hannahgreely</b> - 19 hours ago<b>lailaxjan</b> - 21 hours ago<b>leonel23</b> - yesterday at 2:42am<b>laauramarie</b> - yesterday at 12:17am<b>kasso29</b> - yesterday at 11:08pm<b>rosstheboss2000</b> - yesterday at 11:03pm<b>thefmlman2011</b> - yesterday at 9:38pm<b>b_d_hill</b> - yesterday at 9:37pm<b>sisas</b> - yesterday at 7:13pm<b>superamericankr</b> - yesterday at 6:48pm<b>CoralCrush</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 3:17am<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:35am<b>Theghostlyisaiah</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 7:35pm<b>KiddoKS</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 12:10pm<b>Mortoli</b> - the 09/20/2014 at 8:53am<b>tofuburger</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 7:54pm<b>CVP3</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 10:34am

Liked!<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:35pm<b>BakenWake420</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 6:56am<b>TheViPeRisT</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 5:00am<b>CrAzYELF4</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 4:32am<b>thorus</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:13am

False_Stupidity's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of False_Stupidity's badges

False_Stupidity's favorite FMLs

Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML

#17528012
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (7924)

On 08/20/2011 at 10:08am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, the girl of my dreams that I've been dating for months called me. Apparently she's been having recurring nightmares of me cheating on her. She dumped me "just in case." FML

#17527227
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31882) - you deserved it (2305)

On 08/20/2011 at 5:20am - love - by Username - United States (New York)

Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML

#17470290
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26280) - you deserved it (9372)

On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34738) - you deserved it (9621)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was painting my room. I told my mom not to open the door because I was on a ladder just behind it, with a paint can perched atop. She barged in to ask me what I'd said. FML

#17459271
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29759) - you deserved it (4475)

On 08/13/2011 at 11:31am - misc - by NotSoAnon (man) - United States

Today, I got an anonymous letter, stating my condo's community and all my neighbors can hear me having sex. Not only that, but kids gather around my window to listen. FML

#17354061
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15749) - you deserved it (32693)

On 08/03/2011 at 10:33am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I got an anonymous letter, stating my condo's community and all my neighbors can hear me having sex. Not only that, but kids gather around my window to listen. FML

#17354061
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15749) - you deserved it (32693)

On 08/03/2011 at 10:33am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I got a complaint from my neighbor about a little girl staring at her through my guest bedroom window for the past month. I live alone. And now I'm scared to live in my own house. FML

#17349963
376 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53197) - you deserved it (3269)

On 08/03/2011 at 12:04am - misc - by soccerbuddyz - United States (Florida)

Today, my 15 year old girlfriend called to tell me she is pregnant. Her dad is ex-military, and makes a point of cleaning his guns every time I go to her house. FML

#17010843
708 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18332) - you deserved it (93849)

On 07/07/2011 at 3:43am - kids - by shit - United States

Today, my aunt came into the world. My 67 year-old grandfather married a 24 year-old woman who just gave birth to my new aunt, who is 18 years younger than me. FML

#6117794
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42350) - you deserved it (3247)

On 11/02/2009 at 11:10am - misc - by notsohappyniece (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was introduced to my future stepmother, but it turns out that I already know her. Not only are we the same age and went to the same high school, when we were in the same math class together the teacher would often confuse our names because "we could pass as twins". FML

#4329050
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65193) - you deserved it (2794)

On 08/06/2009 at 4:45am - misc - by whatismydadthinking (woman) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, I had to take a leak, so I went into a porta-john. I noticed another man's hand under the door with a cell phone. Angered, I aimed my stream at his hand and phone. He tilted the porta-john over in response. It was full. FML

#3414555
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44610) - you deserved it (20787)

On 07/02/2009 at 12:13am - misc - by S4L - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
683 comments

I agree, your life sucks (697066) - you deserved it (55876)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

#503348
875 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58676) - you deserved it (624197)

On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: