Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Falkin0113

Online | Search for a member

Falkin0113

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6100
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About Falkin0113 : Hey guys, I'm Fallon. If you're on here it's probably because of some amazingly smart, and beautifully intelligent comment I made. Or you're just being a stalker, either way its cool. Contact me if you feel like it.

Falkin0113's page activity

Visits<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - 2 hours ago<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 12:26am<b>Mindset</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:18am<b>Jaager</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 7:43pm<b>otumboo</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 7:08pm<b>theoneandonlybro</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 5:18pm<b>Loomunati</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 10:26am<b>mysteryguy3039</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 3:31pm<b>ashyknees</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 5:29pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 3:18pm<b>windell</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 10:29pm<b>llamaslikesoda</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 6:28pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 10:26pm<b>Infamous278</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 12:18am<b>skittycat213</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 9:10am<b>GothicKnife</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:20am<b>Cherryta</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:16pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 1:49am

Falkin0113's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of Falkin0113's badges

Falkin0113's favorite FMLs

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25098) - you deserved it (5770)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sent in an assignment from my batshit insane teacher. The assignment was to read a poem, analyze it, and make a comic of its plot. This would've been fine if the teacher who assigned it to me didn't teach math. FML

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

#20197580
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19828) - you deserved it (9663)

On 12/09/2012 at 11:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27117) - you deserved it (1562)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years drunkenly introduced me to another very special lady. His wife. FML

#20197502
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33188) - you deserved it (3273)

On 12/09/2012 at 9:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to see a musical that some school friends had put on. At some point in the show, the main character kicked her leg up in the air, and her high heel flew off of her foot and into the audience. The shoe hit me square in the face. FML

#20196764
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22853) - you deserved it (1749)

On 12/08/2012 at 7:25pm - health - by ko - United States (Illinois)

Today, it's my birthday and my ex husband texted me at midnight to tell happy birthday. Too bad he couldn't have texted my new husband to remind him. FML

#20196242
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26572) - you deserved it (4758)

On 12/08/2012 at 11:12am - love - by aerythia - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my friend and I told each other about our boyfriends. They're both nice, kind, beautiful, talented, funny, sweet and smart. They also both have the same name. And house. And job. And car. FML

#20196037
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41529) - you deserved it (2765)

On 12/08/2012 at 5:44am - love - by ouch. - Canada (Yukon Territory)

Today, I was snooping around in my parents' closet to see what I would get for Christmas, when I came across a UPS package. It was the video game I ordered off eBay 3 weeks ago, addressed to me. They told me it had never arrived and said I should ask Santa to bring it to me. FML

#20195835
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27528) - you deserved it (4283)

On 12/08/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the devil tempted her. FML

#20195064
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33952) - you deserved it (1852)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by sonofahypocriticalwhore (man) - United States

Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the devil tempted her. FML

#20195064
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33952) - you deserved it (1852)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by sonofahypocriticalwhore (man) - United States

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

#20194994
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27441) - you deserved it (16087)

On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28115) - you deserved it (5351)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28115) - you deserved it (5351)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24487) - you deserved it (1665)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: