FailBear920

Search for a member

FailBear920

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 14322
  • Number of comments : 173
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About FailBear920 : TYBG! I'm Based and I Love Lil B

FailBear920's page activity

Visits<b>rajnidevraj1996</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 12:24am<b>billboob</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 2:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 9:10pm<b>dno79</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 12:34am<b>TheGoatTamer</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 12:57am<b>MrConfusion</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 8:29pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 2:44am<b>Wontonfon</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 12:31am<b>Balphleair</b> - the 04/21/2016 at 10:51am<b>luther48</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 11:41am<b>salii321</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 3:23am<b>unsealingkale</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 8:05pm<b>snipebp</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 10:55am<b>Razor011</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 3:42pm<b>weedle99</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 6:49am<b>SegaTortoise</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 7:01pm<b>jacksontb</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 7:50am<b>xXCODGODXx</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 9:28pm

Fucked!<b>unsealingkale</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 1:05am<b>max__333</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 4:39am<b>myelias25</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 12:30pm

FailBear920's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of FailBear920's badges

FailBear920's favorite FMLs

Today, I picked up my cat and it went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML

by Anizzaf / 01/27/2009 at 12:44pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I tried to suck my own penis. Autofellatio. My mother walked in on me and I flipped backwards off the bed. ER and 10 stiches above my eyebrow later, I asked her not to ever bring it up again. FML

by Boredom / 01/26/2009 at 4:09pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I sent out my resume to about a dozen jobs on Craigslist. I realized that I hadn't updated it in a while and went to double check it after the fact. My ex at some point had changed my objective to "I'm a cocksucker who needs a job real bad." FML

by waitingformyfoodstamps / 01/24/2009 at 5:50am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

Today, I was sitting on the couch, computer next to me, lotion on the floor, and my dick in my hand when my roommate walked in on me. Scared and looking me right in the face he says "What's for dinner?". FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2009 at 11:09am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was jerking one off and my cat jumped out of nowhere and dug his claws into my shaft. Attempting to knock him away resulted in three nasty gashes... that I now have to explain to my wife. FML

by stanDman / 01/19/2009 at 1:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, the only girl I really loved said to me: I want you to be the father of my child, but I don't want to be your girlfriend. FML

by J.Smith / 01/15/2009 at 11:12am / Love

Today, I was eating at a nice restaurant. Feeling curious, I daringly asked for the surprise "Maiden's Dream" dessert. The waiter came back with a banana between two balls of ice-cream on a plate, and no spoon. FML

by [email protected] / 01/03/2009 at 3:38am / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend told me that I was irrationally jealous. I’ve just learnt that she has a website where she masturbates in front of a webcam. FML

by Maestro / 12/01/2008 at 1:09am / Intimacy

Today, I was performing the classic 69 position with my girlfriend. I wasn't able to control it : I farted right into her nose. FML

by USSEYL / 11/25/2008 at 11:43pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Intimacy

Today, British Telecom disconnected my landline by mistake. Their call centre in India tried to reach me. Result, they spoke to an unknown gentleman, who told them he didn't need a phone line at my address. Reconnection in 2 business days. FML

by Sugar / 11/22/2008 at 6:51am / United Kingdom / Geek

Today, to my delight I discover that there is security camera in the storage room at my work. The same room where, two days ago I masturbated. FML

by tadam / 11/10/2008 at 4:11am / Work

Today, I did a barbecue. My boss won't believe me tomorrow when I tell him that the main pages of his 2-months work file helped make the best sausages I've ever done. FML

by Sam / 10/30/2008 at 10:51am / Canada (Quebec) / Work