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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found my two best friends making out with each other. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. Today was my wedding day. One of the friends was my maid of honor, the other was my groom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60179) - you deserved it (3012)
On 09/25/2009 at 1:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, after making out with this guy, our tongue piercings got stuck together. After about five minutes of trying to unlock them, I accidentally vomited a little in his mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30343) - you deserved it (29583)
On 09/19/2009 at 1:22am - love - by Pierceew (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I heard my dad screaming in the hallway. Thinking he was having a heart attack I ran to the hall without looking where I was going. I slipped and slid towards my dad in what turned out to be a mass quantity of diarrhea from one of my two dogs. He was screaming because he stepped in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29960) - you deserved it (3217)
On 09/18/2009 at 10:27am - animals - by poopEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized I forgot to write a 5000 word essay for my English class. I tried to be calm since I had until midnight to finish, and it was only 8pm. I typed for three hours straight,and finished the assignment. I read over the instruction again, and realized it only had to be 500 words. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15267) - you deserved it (39622)
On 09/09/2009 at 12:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, as I was walking through the park I had to yawn. In mid-yawn, with my mouth wide open, I walked right through a spider web getting both the spider and the prey it was eating stuck in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36950) - you deserved it (6681)
On 09/08/2009 at 3:02pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I woke up, took a shower, made some pasta, drank 3 glasses of water and brushed my teeth. I then left my apartment to see signs posted all over warning us not to use the water without boiling it because the water company just found E-coli in the water. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43441) - you deserved it (2739)
On 09/08/2009 at 1:29pm - health - by UhOhhhh (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was arguing with my dad. I called him a geriatric fool. He replied with, "Well at least I know who my biological father is." I have no idea if he's joking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44560) - you deserved it (6605)
On 09/07/2009 at 3:19pm - kids - by Waheyyy (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I decided I would finally get up and weed our front yard. After a long couple of hours, I was hot and sweaty and decided to jump in the pool, with all my clothes on, just for fun. Right as I was in the air doing a cannon ball, my BlackBerry started to ring from my pocket... FML
I agree, your life sucks (11632) - you deserved it (46299)
On 09/07/2009 at 1:32pm - money - by ByeByeBlackberry (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45432) - you deserved it (6405)
On 09/07/2009 at 9:32am - love - by GasAttack (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I finally got the courage to go up and ask out the girl I have loved for a couple of months now. After she said yes, I was over the moon and ran home to tell my roommate. The next day, I saw her making out with another man. When I confronted her, she said "Oh, you were serious yesterday?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (39806) - you deserved it (3297)
On 09/01/2009 at 8:52am - love - by lovesucks (man) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML
I agree, your life sucks (74439) - you deserved it (3646)
On 08/31/2009 at 6:05pm - kids - by beya (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at my only sister's wedding. She gave a speech about the person who means the most to her. She said, "She is my favorite sister who has always been there for me." Being her only sister, I got up to hug her. Turns out she was talking about her slutty sorority sister. Not me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43803) - you deserved it (2512)
On 08/31/2009 at 1:21pm - misc - by ohsugarxo (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I came home from a business trip, I walked in to the house to find my husband nowhere to be seen. I called out his name and he came round the corner saying "Coming baby." When he came through the door he said "Oh it's you..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47174) - you deserved it (2004)
On 08/30/2009 at 3:22am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years has children. Not one, not two, but three. Not with one, two, but three women. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40274) - you deserved it (3500)
On 08/28/2009 at 2:42am - misc - by helenablitz (woman) - United States (California)
Today, for my birthday, my mom presented me with a $4,000 check to pay for my braces. I've been very self-conscious about my teeth for years. Everyone applauded and told me how happy they were for me. Later, my mom asked me for the check back. Apparently it was just meant to make her look good. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57279) - you deserved it (1911)
On 08/27/2009 at 1:23pm - money - by crookedteeth (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Monday 17 June 2013
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