F_Ur_Lives

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Offline (the 11/15/2014 at 4:17am)

F_Ur_Lives

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2458
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About F_Ur_Lives : Ummmm.... Hai?

F_Ur_Lives's page activity

Visits<b>AChristenson</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:23pm<b>t_tator</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 6:01pm<b>Arieslink</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 10:40am<b>superrocket19</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 4:32pm<b>lyssaahmarie</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 12:32pm<b>AFaye3964</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 9:05pm<b>icetube550</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 7:13pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 12:54pm<b>tifdunc</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:59pm<b>zBLAKEz</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:38pm<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 7:52am<b>andy594328</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 4:24pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 5:06pm<b>brenden_bates</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 12:36pm<b>pipefitter69</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 10:04pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 8:46pm<b>SuperDani</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 1:06pm<b>Willstar</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 8:34am

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F_Ur_Lives's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking to my boss about dogs and cats. I'm a dog person; he's a cat person. He told me that he likes cats better, because they are laid back and don't do anything all day. Before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "Just like you?" FML

by Respect101 / 06/25/2014 at 8:20pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

by failed dad / 06/25/2014 at 8:30am / Greece (Attiki) / Kids

Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2014 at 5:27am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I walked in on my 15 year old daughter and her boyfriend. They were standing in my bathroom, both naked from the waist down. Supposedly, he was trying to "teach her how to pee standing up." FML

by help me / 06/01/2014 at 11:51am / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy

Today, my neighbor threatened to call the cops if I didn't turn the volume down on my porno. I was only watching women's tennis. FML

by Mem / 05/30/2014 at 4:07pm / Sweden (Gavleborgs Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a pair of eyes looking at me from my closet. Realizing it must be my cat, I called her. She immediately came out from under my bed. I can't find anything in my closet. FML

by Idk / 05/29/2014 at 2:46am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I burned my left breast with hot oil at work. Everyone's now calling me "toaster strudel" and singing "This girl is on fire" every time we cross paths. FML

by angelamegan21 / 05/28/2014 at 4:33pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, I got called "un-American" when I said I didn't care about Kim and Kayne's wedding. FML

by Yeppets / 05/28/2014 at 12:13am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents thought it would be a great surprise to accidentally shoot me in the leg for my birthday. FML

by Birthday Surprise / 05/26/2014 at 5:18pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I collected my students' final essays. One of them submitted a printout of a screenshot he took with his phone. Too bad a browser address bar was still in the shot, along with a "click to read more" link at the bottom. My students are too dumb and lazy to even plagiarize properly. FML

by What am I doing with my life? / 05/22/2014 at 12:47pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, in the middle of my boyfriend finally giving me an orgasm, I had an anxiety attack, which caused him to have an attack of his own. I guess there is such a thing as having too much in common with your partner. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2014 at 12:31pm / Singapore / Intimacy

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm / United States / Love

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

by livingamongtheflowers / 05/15/2014 at 1:40am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2014 at 3:23pm / Canada (Prince Edward Island) / Work

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2014 at 1:42am / United States (Nevada) / Kids