FMLandurstoo

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Offline (the 04/05/2015 at 8:07am)

FMLandurstoo

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 August 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13692
  • Number of comments : 244
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About FMLandurstoo : I'm Mitchell and I'm a senior in high school and FML is one of my favorite things to do in my spare time. My favorite Family guy character is Herbert. Just to make it clear, I am straight. I miss the old days of FML with every1luvsboners and DocBastard (even though he's still here).

FMLandurstoo's page activity

Visits<b>cuz803</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 11:13am<b>Wolfo06</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 10:19am<b>rajnidevraj1996</b> - the 08/31/2016 at 8:32am<b>Sia_Will</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 8:39pm<b>necklacethief</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 11:51pm<b>masterfap</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 7:06am<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 1:42pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 4:53am<b>jasonrellet</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 3:45am<b>OkWhatNow</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 7:42pm<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 2:28am<b>Kidd_Ant</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:13pm<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 10:53pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 8:27am<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 10:27pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 10:19am<b>koalasforlyfe</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 11:20pm<b>_MintyFresh</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 8:36pm

Fucked!<b>cuz803</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 5:13pm<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 8:29am<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:53am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:28pm<b>sarcasm_insanity</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 5:17am<b>Smennant</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 6:45pm<b>cj89898</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 2:26am

FMLandurstoo's FML badges

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FMLandurstoo's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bear to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML

by catlady1989 / 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was fingering my girlfriend. When suddenly she started crying at the peak of her orgasm, when I asked what was wrong, she replied. "I-I-I MISS HIM!" She was crying about her ex boyfriend. While I was inside her. FML

by fingerfuckd / 04/29/2009 at 11:47am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML

by Kelavmeister / 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was selling cookie dough for a fund raiser at an old folks home. One lady ordered a box and told me that she loved cookie dough. I told her it'd be here in 4 weeks, she said "Oh I can't wait!". Not really thinking, as I left I said, "I hope you can make it till then!". FML

by phatkroger10 / 04/09/2009 at 8:16pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML

by ohshittttttt / 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, I was working as the shift manager at my job at a fast food restaurant. Our company policy states that all employees must be clean shaven before coming to work. I had to inform one of the employees, Kris, that they had to shave before clocking in. Kris is a woman. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 2:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was at work at Panera. A blind woman came in, ordered and said other blind people were going to come in soon, because they were having a meeting. Later, a man comes in and ask if any other blind people had showed up. I told him there was just one in here wearing a blue shirt. FML

by superstar / 03/30/2009 at 2:18am / United States (Nebraska) / Work

Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML

by nomorebeard / 03/25/2009 at 10:13am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, the hottest girl in the entire freshman class was telling her friend she was going to Florida for spring break. She said she would be in the same city I would and I couldnt help but say, "Oh, cool! Maybe I'll see you there!" She simply looked at me and said, "I hope not." FML

by evanescence / 03/14/2009 at 8:07pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, My girlfriend who I've been dating for over a year was going to Florida for a short trip with a few friends without me since I couldn't get work off. She asked me to put her iPod in her bag for her as she was almost ready to walk out the door. Thats when I saw she packed 10 condoms with her. FML

by that1guy / 03/14/2009 at 2:25pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while; my dad said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML

by mugs / 03/12/2009 at 3:49pm / United States (Virginia) / Health

Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML

by ihavepinkbackpac / 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my sister had a friend over and I had just gotten out of the shower. I wrapped something around me and walked across the living room. When I walked through, they both started laughing hysterically. Turns out, I grabbed a poncho and the hole for the head ended up right over my crotch. FML

by Noname / 02/22/2009 at 11:50pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching tv when an infomercial for "male enhancement" came on. I grabbed for my phone to make a call when my girlfriend said "O honey, dont buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML

by allyshah / 02/20/2009 at 3:15pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous