About FMLandurstoo : I'm Mitchell and I'm a junior in high school and FML is one of my favorite things to do in my spare time. My favorite Family guy character is Herbert. Just to make it clear, I am straight. I miss the old days of FML with every1luvsboners and DocBastard (even though he's still here).
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Today, I ran into my boyfriend's dad. His exact words were, "Call me when you're ready to feel what a real man can do to you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (53247) - you deserved it (3341)
On 11/03/2011 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23840) - you deserved it (3809)
On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23840) - you deserved it (3809)
On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was hurriedly doing laundry. I threw a second load in the dryer and slammed the door shut. All of a sudden, I heard scratching and whining coming from the dryer. My cat probably hates me now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11786) - you deserved it (24438)
On 11/01/2011 at 3:02pm - animals - by benji - United States (Michigan)
Today, on a dating site, I was matched with my brother, again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40115) - you deserved it (4002)
On 11/01/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Today, I learned that all of the anonymous Valentine's gifts I received throughout high school were sent out of pity by my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24233) - you deserved it (2266)
On 10/31/2011 at 2:45am - misc - by Mister_Triangle - United States
Today, I finally found out where my great grandmother's antique handheld mirror disappeared to. According to the headmaster, my eleven year old son has been using it to look up his classmates' dresses at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18975) - you deserved it (1973)
On 10/28/2011 at 8:25am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my roomate informed me that her snake was missing in our apartment again. Apparently, I need to be careful because the snake's attracted to blood. I'm on my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24438) - you deserved it (1835)
On 10/27/2011 at 11:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25475) - you deserved it (5965)
On 10/27/2011 at 8:22am - intimacy - by ifeeldirty (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got a boner at the dentist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27624) - you deserved it (6125)
On 10/27/2011 at 2:40am - intimacy - by Me - United States
Today, I convinced my best friend to talk to the guy I like at work to find out if he was interested in me. She came back ten minutes later, and told me he said he'd never be able to date me. Apparently, kissing me "would be like making out with Mother Teresa's corpse." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20977) - you deserved it (2841)
On 10/26/2011 at 9:38pm - love - by nekogirl15 (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, it's the third day of my dad's revenge after he snapped over me supposedly using the word "duh" in every other sentence. He got his hands on my old recorder and has been playing it loudly and out of tune outside my room when I try to do my homework. My mom thinks this is hilarious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14665) - you deserved it (10474)
On 10/26/2011 at 8:24pm - misc - by krystal (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was getting intimate with my husband on our anniversary day. He climbed on top of me and firmly placed his penis on my nose. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he burst into laughter and said I looked just like Squidward. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33368) - you deserved it (3931)
On 10/26/2011 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my parents got rid of our detachable shower head. Looks like I'm single again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21906) - you deserved it (23027)
Today, without telling me, my mom dropped me off at my grandmother's house, and drove off. Now I'm supposed to spend the next month with her. Guess she forgot my grandma died six weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39662) - you deserved it (2337)
On 10/24/2011 at 10:55am - misc - by lonely - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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