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Espeon205

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Espeon205

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 172
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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Espeon205's page activity

Visits<b>ewmoldycheese</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 8:46pm

Espeon205's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Espeon205's badges

Espeon205's favorite FMLs

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46433) - you deserved it (6560)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, Facebook put something out that shows a video of your entire life on the website. A part of it showed your most popular status update. Mine was from when I got dumped at Christmas. FML

#21050703
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47483) - you deserved it (4855)

On 02/04/2014 at 9:25pm - love - by BigLove (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I lost my virginity. We did it on the floor in my step-sister's room, and the entire time he kept pushing my head into the carpet. I lost my V-card but gained rug burn on my face that looks like a fatal disease. FML

#21016206
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44493) - you deserved it (20137)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my daughter started speaking with hashtags. I told her to knock it off, to which she replied, "You don't get it, mom - hashtag white girl probs." Hashtag FML

#21016204
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51581) - you deserved it (5900)

On 01/04/2014 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45968) - you deserved it (3631)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I was rubbing one out in the shower. I guess I got a little too excited, because as I came close to climaxing, I had a serious asthma attack and had to wheeze for help. FML

#20975074
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45784) - you deserved it (11231)

On 11/29/2013 at 7:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44477) - you deserved it (17984)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, my mom bitched me out for still being single at age 19, and still not having started a family. She considers this "immoral," yet showed nothing but praise for my sister, who's pregnant at 15 and doesn't know which of three guys is the father. FML

#20960837
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58010) - you deserved it (2696)

On 11/17/2013 at 12:46pm - misc - by failed brood mare (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got proposed to. I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 years and we have 2 kids. It was perfect, except it was my ex-boyfriend who proposed to me. FML

#20901818
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45817) - you deserved it (5461)

On 09/30/2013 at 10:47am - love - by courtnayy (woman) - United States

Today, while on the airplane, the cute girl next to me and I instantly hit it off. When I excused myself to the bathroom, I must have given her the wrong impression. She wanted to join the mile high club; I just wanted to take a crap. FML

#20781742
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58541) - you deserved it (12250)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:41am - intimacy - by mile high clubber - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

#20740333
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76281) - you deserved it (17337)

On 06/22/2013 at 2:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55147) - you deserved it (64260)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while shaving my nether regions, I slipped and sliced myself in three separate places. They won't completely stop bleeding. I'm virtually having a second period, and it hurts to close my legs. FML

#20555131
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32543) - you deserved it (6983)

On 03/22/2013 at 3:15pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Italy (Calabria)

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon" and ended the same conversation with "and that's why we should divorce." FML

#20495499
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43262) - you deserved it (4020)

On 02/06/2013 at 8:38am - love - by PokeWife (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I tried to get my boyfriend to roll over while he was asleep. He snores loud enough to wake the neighbors and if he lays on his side he usually stops. Instead of rolling over, he stuck his leg in the air, farted twice, and laughed about it in his sleep. He's still snoring. FML

#20447496
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35862) - you deserved it (5177)

On 01/08/2013 at 2:44am - misc - by no sleep for me -



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