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Epikouros

Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 11:56am) | Search for a member

Epikouros

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 January 1971 (43 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13528
  • Number of comments : 1196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Epikouros : Today, I noticed my ear-raping Rebecca Black parody on Youtube has more views than all of my intellectual blog posts since 2004 put together. FML

That's when I stopped blogging and started hanging out on FML.

My favorite commenters are NoorFML, DocBastard, perdix, DjeePee, nerdsgetmehot, Baustigt, Enslaved, The_A_Teen, ElenasBrazilian and Doortje.

Epikouros's page activity

Visits<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 7:18am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 3:08pm<b>SHAMUS_the_WITTY</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:05am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 3:02am<b>SampleSext</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 12:18am<b>taintedtruffle</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 10:22pm<b>chubbychick</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 9:55am<b>ejkst19</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:35am<b>madisonn678</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 11:35pm<b>hduebdo</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 10:13am<b>maxx1222</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 11:43am<b>urdirtyolduncle</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 9:41pm<b>RavingHaven</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 8:15am<b>more4me</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 3:51am<b>juststephhere</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 4:57pm<b>NickyB85</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 9:01am<b>kitkat1399</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 11:47pm<b>elevenplus</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 8:05pm

Epikouros's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Epikouros's badges

Epikouros's favorite FMLs

Today, I got an e-mail regarding an IT support job I applied to. The e-mail had numerous formatting errors due to bad code, and typos all over the place. It said I wasn't qualified for the job. FML

#21011264
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37128) - you deserved it (2912)

On 12/31/2013 at 3:08am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my 4-year-old daughter figured out how to set a parental code lock on our television so we can't watch football because it scares her when we scream. She won't tell us no matter what we bribe her with. FML

#21010264
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45057) - you deserved it (23440)

On 12/30/2013 at 7:10am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

#21009159
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50510) - you deserved it (26247)

On 12/29/2013 at 7:36am - intimacy - by Jizzyface (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, marks the third week since my sister's guinea pig learned to masturbate. He humps his wheel and makes squeaking noises for five minutes, then rolls over on his side and pants heavily. He does it at least twice a night while I'm trying to sleep. FML

#21008605
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45942) - you deserved it (3631)

On 12/28/2013 at 7:31pm - animals - by Anonomous - United States (Vermont)

Today, I asked my husband to try a little foreplay for once, instead of just rushing into sex. His idea of foreplay was to sweetly whisper that he was going to "penis" me so hard. That's the first time I've heard the word "penis" used as a verb, and hopefully the last. FML

#21007475
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48923) - you deserved it (6446)

On 12/27/2013 at 5:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I discovered the real reason my husband was distraught last week and has been acting moodily ever since. An attractive girl he was secretly having sex chats with online confessed to him that "she" was actually a guy. FML

#21007435
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44651) - you deserved it (4086)

On 12/27/2013 at 4:49pm - love - by -__- (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I received a pair of earrings, a necklace, and some rings as a Christmas gift from my grandma. This would have been nice if I weren't a guy. This is her way of mocking me for wearing what she calls "girl colors", such as white. FML

#21004875
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37928) - you deserved it (2991)

On 12/25/2013 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mother gave me a Christmas present for the first time in 15 years: a dog. Her 16-year-old, untrained, mean dog who wears diapers. FML

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

#21001182
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48902) - you deserved it (4871)

On 12/22/2013 at 10:36am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via a sign he made in front of my Minecraft house. FML

#21000308
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44975) - you deserved it (5948)

On 12/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by back to creepers (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, my boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML

#20989324
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50615) - you deserved it (8020)

On 12/11/2013 at 7:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53194) - you deserved it (4609)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my grandma commented on my Facebook profile picture: "That's a great photo! It doesn't look anything like you!" FML

#20982946
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36060) - you deserved it (3299)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by oh (woman) - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I dyed my hair. And my forehead. And my ears. And my arms. And my hands. FML

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments


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