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Epikouros

Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 11:56am) | Search for a member

Epikouros

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 January 1971 (44 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 20468
  • Number of comments : 1196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Epikouros : Today, I noticed my ear-raping Rebecca Black parody on Youtube has more views than all of my intellectual blog posts since 2004 put together. FML

That's when I stopped blogging and started hanging out on FML.

My favorite commenters are NoorFML, DocBastard, perdix, DjeePee, nerdsgetmehot, Baustigt, Enslaved, The_A_Teen, ElenasBrazilian and Doortje.

Epikouros's page activity

Visits<b>SeanLewis</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 9:54am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 3:49pm<b>Vanlendauman</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 4:20pm<b>missmorggan</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 2:06pm<b>LoganStar4</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 7:43pm<b>Soninuva</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 2:59am<b>bloodwraith96</b> - the 02/15/2015 at 4:43am<b>Welshite</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 10:02pm<b>cmonger</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 9:47am<b>sammy18f</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 4:12pm<b>RageWolf16</b> - the 12/28/2014 at 5:42pm<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 4:15pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 12:34am<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 7:18am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 3:08pm<b>SHAMUS_the_WITTY</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 10:05am<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 3:02am<b>SampleSext</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 12:18am

Epikouros's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Epikouros's badges

Epikouros's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally exchanged pictures with the woman I've been seeing online for some time now. She replied, saying "Thats not funny. Some people actually look like that." I sent my real picture, and thought I actually looked pretty good in it. FML

#1193319
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71067) - you deserved it (6696)

On 04/21/2009 at 2:21pm - love - by Anon (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I wanted to change out of my bikini for the ride home from the beach. There wasn't a bathroom near, so I went to change in front of a suburban, parked far away from all the people. I took off my suit, hear the car's horn honk, only to find that the car was completely packed with old men. FML

#1141291
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14171) - you deserved it (63510)

On 04/20/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by steph (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my car got a flat tire. I jacked up my car, removed the flat and went to get my spare out of the trunk. Where my spare is supposed to be I found a note. It said "You're a bitch - John". John is my ex boyfriend. He borrowed my car the day we broke up, apparently he stole my spare tire too. FML

#1039565
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50710) - you deserved it (9033)

On 04/16/2009 at 10:38pm - love - by jacked (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was walking back to my home in the city in the dark. I'm paranoid, so when I saw movement behind me I clutched my mace. The faster I walked, the closer the person seemed to be. I spun around and sprayed my attacker with mace. It was my shadow and the wind blew the mace back into eyes. FML

#1026397
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27794) - you deserved it (81686)

On 04/16/2009 at 5:27pm - misc - by Eyesore - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML

#1023184
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13479) - you deserved it (71282)

On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking an exam and I knew I was unprepared, so I wrote some cheat notes on my ankle. As I cross my legs to look at my notes, I realize I wore tall boots to class. I can't even cheat properly. FML

#1018681
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15463) - you deserved it (127845)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:21pm - misc - by Joe (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up on my mom's couch with a wicked hangover. I made a mad dash for the toilet but felt the wave coming after two steps. I grabbed a bag of trash next to the front door and showed it no mercy. After I'd recovered and cleaned up, Mom asked if I'd seen the bag with her tax materials. FML

#993995
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20219) - you deserved it (61792)

On 04/15/2009 at 3:47pm - health - by caramelkarma (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML

#981592
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (95653) - you deserved it (39083)

On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
703 comments

I agree, your life sucks (734353) - you deserved it (56673)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

#909616
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67737) - you deserved it (19974)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

#881347
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40869) - you deserved it (135220)

On 04/09/2009 at 2:03am - work - by tool (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

#843065
690 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36739) - you deserved it (501883)

On 04/06/2009 at 8:41pm - misc - by blovesg (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
936 comments

I agree, your life sucks (367956) - you deserved it (41188)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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