Epikouros

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Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 11:56am)

Epikouros

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 January 1971 (45 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 29323
  • Number of comments : 1196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Epikouros : Today, I noticed my ear-raping Rebecca Black parody on Youtube has more views than all of my intellectual blog posts since 2004 put together. FML

That's when I stopped blogging and started hanging out on FML.

My favorite commenters are NoorFML, DocBastard, perdix, DjeePee, nerdsgetmehot, Baustigt, Enslaved, The_A_Teen, ElenasBrazilian and Doortje.

Epikouros's page activity

Visits<b>DesignOfHalogen</b> - the 10/28/2016 at 3:06pm<b>Tattooed_momster</b> - the 10/10/2016 at 2:15pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 10:49am<b>danandphil</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 11:33pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 5:16pm<b>XxDARKWOLFxX</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 10:11am<b>heatherrr17</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 2:02am<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 8:46am<b>Nakomai</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 7:00am<b>walker9879</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 12:34pm<b>necklacethief</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 12:44pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:21pm<b>dannyoshea</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 5:26pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:43am<b>michu</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 3:22pm<b>konan__</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:21am<b>dman30</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:39pm<b>mkris</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 12:47am

Fucked!<b>heatherrr17</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 8:02am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 10:23pm<b>Evocator</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 11:19pm

Epikouros's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Epikouros's badges

Epikouros's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog farted next to my CPAP sleep/breathing machine. The machine sucked up her fart, compressed it, and promptly injected it up both of my nostrils. FML

by Dog fart / 02/13/2010 at 11:08am / United States / Animals

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

by kingmetal42 / 02/09/2010 at 2:10pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML

by christian9294 / 02/08/2010 at 3:21pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my son learned about various animals in school, and how they urinate to mark their territory. Apparently, the entire second floor of my house is now my son's territory. FML

by grrrr / 02/07/2010 at 7:35pm / United States / Kids

Today, I made a friend on an online chat. We got along fairly well and even traded Facebook accounts. I found out that the two of us had a lot of very surprising things in common. We were the same age, we were from the same school, and we even had the same boyfriend. FML

by Zephyric / 02/02/2010 at 1:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, after having been a vegetarian for 8 years because I'm opposed to cruelty to animals, I lost a bet and had to eat a whole cheeseburger. I loved it. FML

by Anonymous / 01/29/2010 at 2:25am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML

by Crap / 01/28/2010 at 12:01am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my boyfriend isn't gay. Apparently, I just give good head. FML

by Anonymous / 01/24/2010 at 3:55am / Australia (Western Australia) / Intimacy

Today, I have been dating an incredibly gorgeous woman. She had a poor self image and after the longest time, I finally convinced her to seek counselling to help her self esteem. It worked. So well in fact that she just broke up with me because she "finally realized she could do so much better" FML

by Anonymous / 01/22/2010 at 7:10pm / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML

by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML

by Oops / 01/14/2010 at 10:55am / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, I met my boyfriend's notoriously difficult mother. I had been looking forward to meeting her and making a good impression. Unfortunately, I could not greet her as her son's penis was still in my mouth. FML

by pleasedtomeetyou / 01/13/2010 at 11:42am / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I made a fake MySpace so that I could flirt with my boyfriend and see what he would do. He ended up dumping me for the fake MySpace girl. FML

by BetterThanFake / 01/12/2010 at 7:03pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

by PeanutlyDisabled / 01/08/2010 at 2:23am / France / Kids