Epikouros

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Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 11:56am)

Epikouros

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 25 January 1971 (45 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 27042
  • Number of comments : 1196
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About Epikouros : Today, I noticed my ear-raping Rebecca Black parody on Youtube has more views than all of my intellectual blog posts since 2004 put together. FML

That's when I stopped blogging and started hanging out on FML.

My favorite commenters are NoorFML, DocBastard, perdix, DjeePee, nerdsgetmehot, Baustigt, Enslaved, The_A_Teen, ElenasBrazilian and Doortje.

Epikouros's page activity

Visits<b>XxDARKWOLFxX</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 10:11am<b>heatherrr17</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 2:02am<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 8:46am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 4:23pm<b>Nakomai</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 7:00am<b>walker9879</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 12:34pm<b>necklacethief</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 12:44pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:21pm<b>dannyoshea</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 5:26pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 5:43am<b>michu</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 3:22pm<b>konan__</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:21am<b>dman30</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:39pm<b>mkris</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 12:47am<b>plebs_everywhere</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 12:23am<b>33kameron33</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 9:22pm<b>Njunge</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 11:13pm<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 8:28pm

Fucked!<b>heatherrr17</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 8:02am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 10:23pm<b>Evocator</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 11:19pm

Epikouros's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of Epikouros's badges

Epikouros's favorite FMLs

Today, I was rushed to the hospital to deliver my child. On the way, I called my husband who was in a bar with his friends. Drunk, he just yelled, "BROS BEFORE HOS!!" and hung up. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2010 at 5:42pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my "I don't believe in pre-marital sex" boyfriend is the father of my younger sister's newborn baby. After four years of being in a serious, but sexless, relationship, I am now single, horny, and an aunt. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2010 at 12:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I woke up finding out I had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything, aparently I talked through out my dream, she was right next to me listening. FML

by Anonymous / 10/03/2010 at 10:04pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I saw a small child take a really bad fall off his scooter, so I got rid of my cigarette and ran to help him. I asked him if he was alright, or if I could walk him to his house. He replied "I'm okay, but your dress is on fire." It was. FML

by Laura / 09/21/2010 at 8:31pm / United States / Kids

Today, I had to listen to my mother flirting on the phone with my dad's new girlfriend's ex-husband. FML

by messyfamily / 09/19/2010 at 3:31am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, a crying kid was brought to my attention by a customer. He was so upset from losing his mom that he couldn't say his name or his moms name. I took him around the store asking him to point out his mom. Once we found her she told me "I was hiding from my kid to test his independence." FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2010 at 12:27am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, I got to my weekly drama group a bit late. Everyone looked surprised when I walked in. Casually, I sat down and apologised for being late. I thought everyone looked awkward, probably because it turned out I'd been kicked out of the group. The teacher had decided to announce it before making sure I'd got the email. FML

by a7xforever / 09/14/2010 at 4:31am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

by Username / 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm / Kids

Today, I was asked to crawl through a sun roof because one of my co workers locked her keys in her car. After I got the keys, instead of opening the car door, I climbed back out through the sun roof. To laughter. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2010 at 8:10pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

by gorillalove / 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2010 at 4:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend proposed. The ring just had a piece of graphite on it. My boyfriend argued that since graphite and diamonds are both just forms of carbon, it is the same thing. FML

by pencilring / 09/04/2010 at 10:08am / United States / Love

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

by Anonymous / 09/01/2010 at 7:04pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was in the airport after saying goodbye to my boyfriend who left for three months. Walking back to my car, I saw a young couple kissing passionately. If that wasn't bad enough, the guy then picked his girlfriend up, spun her round in the air and her foot kicked me square in the jaw. FML

by ouch / 09/01/2010 at 9:50am / Belgium (Brabant) / Love

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

by Bailey / 08/22/2010 at 2:58am / United States (Nebraska) / Kids